#Hoping this doesn’t read as me being mean or mad. I am not trying to give off either of those things right now!!
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dstconfessions · 3 months ago
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Kind of annoyed by the Wes being trans confession as it implies men can’t be effeminante without being women.
There’s so many kinds of people, just because they dont fit into your ideal image of what a gender is to you doesn’t mean they are one or the other
I don’t think that ask was implying that whatsoever. It’s just a fun headcanon! Perfectly fine to not like someone’s opinion, but saying that liking trans Wes implies they think men can’t be feminine doesn’t make sense.
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inthelibrarybtw · 20 days ago
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you're gonna go far | one - the boneyard
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SERIES MASTERLIST pairing: rafe cameron x pogue!reader
summary: where rafe who hates pogues has a soft spot for a pogue girl, who couldn't care less about him, it's too independent and too focused on graduating college and making it out of the cut to pay attention to him or where they say they don't like each other yet for a reason they are always at the same place at the same time, him making time for her and her never pushing away but again they don't like each other. word count: 3.1k content: rafe being an asshole, angst, cursing, pogue/kook talk, inaccurate weather facts lol authors note: this is my first official fic and series, please be kind english is my second language so excuse any grammar errors. not only am i excited but im also nervous this is the first time im letting people read anything i've ever written, i really hope you guys like it. reblogs, comments and like are always appreciated ❀。• *₊°。 ❀°。• *₊°。 ❀°。
He made his way to the Boneyard once again. Ever since Sarah had started dating John B he heard a lot more about these parties, he loved to party and he was not going to miss one. Also he needed to keep an eye on his sister, sister who he never really saw at the parties unless there was a fight. That was the only reason that made sense and he was trying to convince himself it was the only one.
But the real reason made him lose his mind, he doesn’t get it, Rafe used to hate all pogues, but that one party Sarah invited her and her pogue friends and he almost lost it when she saw her, he had never seen her before and after that he never stopped looking for her and at her, usually she was mad at him for annoying her friends and he got pissed at her for calling him on his shit and didn’t want anything to do with him. Yet he wanted to know her. 
So there he was again at another Boneyard party, he wasn’t really in the mood but anything to see you. He really doesn’t get it, as much as he wants to hate you and despise you, he can't and that’s how he ended up going back to his car to grab his jacket and making his way to you. The party was in full blast but you had needed a break so you were sitting alone on a blanket over the sand looking at the ocean, hugging yourself. For a mid June night it was cold, too cold, probably a storm or a hurricane was coming soon. 
As if it was heaven sent a puffy jacket wrapped you up “you’ll get sick” you looked up to be met with Rafe’s stoic face as if what he just did was nothing “it’s freezing” he said sitting next to you. 
“I'm gonna be fine” you said, as much as you would want to take the jacket your pride was bigger so you started taking it off to give it back but he stopped you by putting it back. 
He scoffs before answering “right, like you’re not trembling, just take it” you didn’t hesitate, it felt good but you weren’t going to admit it to his face.
“What about you?” you turned to look at him, he didn’t look cold but still.
“I’m fine, you need it more than me” his eyes darted over at your body, a weird feeling forming in his stomach at seeing you with something of his enveloping. 
“what’s that supposed to mean?” you looked at him, putting your arms in the jacket, it looked like his jacket had swallowed you up and he smirked at the sight.
 “Nothing, just you were shaking and I’m not” he rolled his eyes
“Right…” Rafe being nice to you wasn’t new but you were still a bit on edge being around him “Thanks” you said softly, as you looked around, everyone was enjoying the party, it was one of those moments where you would think why were you there, you could be doing anything else. You were already thinking about going back to college, community college wasn’t the plan but you were more than grateful for getting a scholarship, as much as community college wasn’t that expensive for a pogue it was a lot. 
Rafe interrupted your thoughts when he cleared his throat “You’re not going to go back to everyone?” as much as he had attempted to make it sound as a question it sounded more like a demand and order even. 
“Not right now, why?” you turned to look at him, with a confused look. You wanted to go home but if you didn’t stick around a while longer your friends would ask and you liked to avoid the questions. 
“I don't think they want to hang out with a pogue” of course he would say something like that, he was an asshole and yet you didn’t go away. You rolled your eyes. 
“Well you are hanging out with said pogue” touché he thought 
“Well I'm different” he said as if it was the most obvious answer ever
You scrunched up your face “oh and why’s that?” Rafe was the perfect example of why you hated pogues, they thought they were better than everyone, maybe not everyone but most of them were like him, he was so infuriating and you wanted to scream at him sometimes and you had done it but everytime that feeling would be different. 
“Because I’m me and I can do whatever I want” this man you thought, you just hummed in annoyance, he was so unbelievable. “Just do go near them” he had to be joking 
“I will if I want to” he turned his head quickly as if you had said the worst thing ever, Rafe had a thing of struggling to show his true feelings and of course he would rather choke than admit he wanted you to stay there with him talking, he wanted to get to know you but he was clearly terrible at showing it.  
“Does it look like I care? just don’t go, got it?” you were stoic, how the hell were you supposed to react to that. “Rafe…” “Don’t Rafe me, I don’t want you to be near them” them who? And why the hell did he care what you did or not. 
“I’m not yours to control, I don’t even listen to my mother, what makes you think I will listen to you?” his face contorted in annoyance, sassy pogue he thought before speaking.
“I’m just trying to look out for you pogue” the way he said pogue with such disdain, you knew he hated pogues, you hated him albeit you were there still sitting with his jacket over your shoulders but you hated him.
“You hate pogues” she can’t let one go he huffs almost as if it's amusing to see you mad  
“Usually i do, all of them are annoying, but…” he pauses for a second thinking as if it’s a good idea to continue talking “you just… you’re different” 
“Whatever that means” was that a good thing? who knew it was Rafe Cameron after all.
“It means you don’t piss me off as much as the rest and I don’t want to see you getting hurt or dragged into something in between the pogues or kooks” he paused then continued “why are you even friends with them?” 
not see me get hurt? most of the times before you had been the one yelling at him or his friends to back away but in that moment you rather not fight with him about it “they just get me, we grew up together” 
“How on earth can they get you, they are them and you’re…” he trailed off “I just don’t get how you can just hang out with them” his irritation was growing, you noticed but you didn’t care.
“You have no right to talk about them when you’re the one who doesn’t get it!” you huff
“What I don't get huh? that you love hanging around them in the Cut” you sighed, stupid kook
“I'm Pogue! The Cut is my home” and you would do anything to change that, Pope was the only one who knew how much you hated living there… “That's my life!” 
“That's what I don’t get, you’re better than that! that’s a hellhole” as much as you don't like it there, it was still your home and you could call it a hellhole, you lived there, he had barely set foot in it, so what would he know? he didn’t have the right  “living there doesn’t mean you have to hang out with them” 
“They are my friends, they truly get it, they know how hard life can be and unfair it can get” his chest feels tight all of a sudden he doesn't get it, he never feels like that. He studies your face trying to think what he can say next. 
“You could do better, find new friends, kooks, pogues will keep dragging you down” You stare at him looking for a trace of it being a joke and he is being serious, you laugh bitterly. 
“Why would I want to be with the kooks? they look down at us as if we're trash, we're people!” Rafe goes silent, his jaw clenching annoyed, he knew he treated your friends like that most of the time and he hated that you were right about it. 
“I don’t think you're trash” he groans in frustration “What aren’t you getting pogue? they are assholes, you don’t deserve being around assholes who pull you back” 
“You're not understanding kook, they are my friends, my family even, they are important to me, I care for them, we stick by each other and we actually push each other to do things better because we want out, we do not want to stay in The Cut forever” You didn’t, a part of you knew that JJ and John B didn’t really care, yes they wanted better but that didn’t necessarily mean get out of the Cut. Then there was Kie who was born a kook and liked more the pogue life? A part of you was angry at Kie, she had the privileges you would kill for and she took them all for granted, you loved her but still it made you frustrated. 
He scoffs, he hates the tone you’re going for, yes it’s the same he’s giving you but he doesn’t like it when it’s aimed at him and coming from you. If it had been by any chance any other pogue he would’ve either fought them or ignored them but it was you… “Oh and how are you supposed to do that? work your ass off for minimum wage? Pogues don’t make it out that easily” 
“And you think I'm not aware? still doesn’t mean I can’t make it” You were trying to keep your calm, he was getting on your nerves, you had heard that a thousand times but coming from him right there felt somehow even worse, not even a few minutes ago he had given you his jacket, that had been nice but apparently he was allergic to it and had to go back to his usual asshole self. 
“Then why even try? The Cut is like a black hole that swallows people and you can never escape” You had enough, he had the nerve to say all that when his own father came from the Cut and made it out. You didn’t really like Ward Cameron, granted not a lot of people did but you did have to give him that, he made it out and he wasn’t the best person but he was all the proof you needed to know you could too. 
“Because it is not impossible, your dad did” you saw him tense up at the mention of his father, well know you knew how to piss him off. You regretted using a clearly sensitive topic for him but he deserved it you tried to convince yourself. You didn’t really like confrontation but with him every word flew out of your mouth without hesitancy it made you feel good, like you were brave enough and in the eyes of a lot of people you were, it was Rafe Cameron who you would stand up against and he could be an asshole but at the same time respected that you would run your mouth at him even if it made you a pain in his ass from time to time. 
“My dad was different, it was a rare thing, like winning the lottery you know?” you muttered a small right looking at the sand, of course he was going to be an asshole about it. He saw your reaction and felt like he needed to comfort you. “What I’m saying is…” he didn’t really know if he was going to say the right thing, he sucked at comforting people “you’re gonna have a hard time getting out of there, maybe you’re gonna be better… like better off staying there, just accepting the reality” 
You looked at him, if you could strangle him with a look you would’ve done it, you scoff biting the inside of your cheek “You know what Rafe, fuck you, you don’t get it!” You stand up and take his jacket off and throw it at him before walking away. 
“Hey! Wait, where are you going?” he stands up calling you out, grabbing his jacket but you’re already walking as fast as you could to get away from him “ugh this girl…” he sighed, you annoyed him so much yet he felt bad, the look on your face before leaving, the words it had affected him more than he liked to admit. And watching you go directly to JJ after it just made it worse. You had heard him but you ignored him, what had made him think that any of what he said was okay? 
When you finally made your way back to your friends you regretted throwing him his jacket back, you were cold again. “Ah she 's back! where were you?” JJ piped in first as he watched you sitting near the bonfire. 
Just like Rafe you would rather choke than admit you liked talking to him and that’s where you were “Just taking a break from all this” you nodded hugging yourself, and if i go back? just for the jacket… 
“You’re cold? there’s a hoodie on the Twinkie you can grab it” JJ said as he walked to grab another beer, you nodded and decided to go grab it, maybe even stay in the twinkie. You made your way to where the Twinkie was parked. 
Rafe didn’t leave the party even after the little fight, he was keeping an eye on you from a distance, he did that way more than he liked to admit. He decided to follow you to wherever you were going. You were about to close the Twinkie with the hoodie on hand when Rafe showed up “You know you can always have this back” he lifted his hand where he had his jacket. You rolled your eyes while you put on the less warm hoodie. 
I huffed, closing the door of the Twinkie  “I don’t need or want your help, maybe you should too accept that reality” you said bitterly making reference to what he had said to you earlier. 
He rolled his eyes, he felt guilty for saying what he said but it was done and was trying to make it better without even saying sorry “You don’t let one go huh?” 
“You’re an asshole with me and then you want me to be okay with it? things don’t work that way, at least acknowledge that what you said was wrong” you crossed your arms, staring at him. He knew he was wrong, he felt bad about it but he wasn’t going to apologize or acknowledge it because every word you said spiked up his irritation in a way only you could. 
“If being wrong is stating facts then yeah im wrong” you groaned in frustration, again why did you even indulge him? It was like you were being pulled to him, as much as you knew you could just don’t talk back you never kept quiet with him, it was physically impossible.
“You’re an asshole, you come here saying stuff when you don’t even have a clue what it is to live in a place you hate but it’s still your home” he felt a sudden anger bubbling up, oh he knew about hating the place where he lived a little too much for his liking but you weren’t done talking “you’re so infuriating first you say I'm too much for the pogues, newsflash I’m one! that they hold me down but then when I tell you I want to do better you’re telling me I should give up?” you groaned in frustration and ran your hands through your hair. 
He stared at you, you looked pretty all angry at him, he shook his head, focusing back on his irritation “you’re done with your tantrum?” He knew that was just gonna make you even more mad and maybe he wanted to see how far he could take it, as much as he was different with you, he still was Rafe. The cocky kook asshole who thought everyone should listen to his words. You clenched your jaw from the annoyance. 
“What you didn’t like what I said? sorry I was just stating facts” you lifted a brow testing him back, you weren’t afraid of him, your friends had told you in multiple times to be careful that you didn’t know who you were messing with, but nothing ever happened to you beside the same old pogue comments and you were used to them they did hurt sometimes but nothing worth crying over it. It just fueled you to prove to everyone or him you could do the things he never thought you would. 
“Do you ever know when to shut up?” he huffed and you felt a pang of hurt in your chest. Out of all he had said this is what ends up actually hurting you? You swallowed and looked up at him “oh you do know when to shut up” he smirked, his stupid smug face, why did he have to be like that? 
“Do you ever know when to stop?” you pushed past him, you knew why this had hurt more than the rest of the things but you chose to ignore it, you could deal with that later or never. You turned around to walk back to where the rest of the people were. 
“Wait!” he yanked you back “you don’t get to tell me what to do” you looked at him frustrated, you closed your eyes and took a deep breath to try and calm yourself down but it was useless. 
“Neither do you!” I pulled my arm from his grasp “never touch me again, I don’t want to see you around, stick to the words you have said to my friends a thousand times, stay on your side of the island kook!” you had used the word with the same distaste he used the word pogue, you were done, he had made you feel horrible twice and you allowed it. You stormed off and this time he didn’t stop you, the words kept ringing in his head until Topper called him out. They were ready to leave and at the same time you convinced JJ to take you back to your house, Rafe looked from a distance, anger bubbling up inside him but there was nothing he could do about it. 
He left the party not long after you did, parts of the conversation replaying in his head.
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taglist: @starkeyvhs @oxpogues4lifexo @persiar9 @lenasvoid @zyafics if you want to be added send an ask or comment! :)
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INTHELIBRARYBTW ✧.*
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amphitriteswife · 23 days ago
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Would you love me if i was a worm?
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The question made you pause your youtube video. You turned around and looked at Jeagyeon who was staring into your soul with slippers on and his legs crossed on your bed. His eyes held an almost scary type of ‘say yes.’ In them. Where did this question even come from? Was he going trough an insecure episode? ‘First of all, get those dawgs onto the floor. Second of all. No.’ Jaegyeon gasped loudly. He seemed genuinely surprised by your answer. He expected you to actually say yes, maybe even a cute little joke or a wholesome idea. Not a no. You can’t say no to him. He doesn’t accept no’s. ‘Excuse me?’ He asked you offended, his hand on his chest with narrowed eyes. A few gasps and scoffs could be heard as they left his mouth. The way he looked around as if someone had slapped him mixed with the genuine emotion of hurt was making you hold in your breath. ‘this is not funny! I am hurting.’ He stated bluntly while his eyes shot daggers at you. ‘Now you’re just being dramatic.’ ‘I’m going to die now because of you.’ Drama queen🙄
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‘I would probably sit on you by accident.’ You told the blonde haired man, still facing your screen and not paying attention to him. Just until a second ago he was busy rummaging trough your stuff and asking stupid question. He was bored okay? And you not paying attention to him didn’t help either. He couldn’t help but be sulky, Yet your answer made him stop his sulkiness and frown instead. He couldn’t help but think for a moment…it’s not that bad to be honest. He did expect a better answer…but it could’ve been worse right? At least that’s what he hopes. Goo left your drawer full of messed up clothes alone and instead jumped on you, his head resting on your shoulder. He didn’t seem too sulky anymore and instead gave you a kiss on the cheek ‘well at least i’ll get to suffocate cause of your butt’ ‘that’s not-’ ‘I would love to die like that..not even jonggun can surpass that.’
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‘No ew you’re gross and dirty then.’ The answer made James a little disheartened, he expected you to actually say yes, maybe with a kiss too. He would’ve done it. His face fell from a wholesome and romantic look to a deadpanned one, just for a second, a split second, you could see the hint of anger in his eyes before he smiled at you. It was a creepy smile. One that looked very happy and cheerful. Eyebrows raised, eyes closed and a rather wide smile, he only did that when he was putting up his idol image…or when he was super mad. It made you feel a little bad for him…’i’m sorry.’ ‘Don’t be. Your answer was honest.’ ‘No really i am sorry.’ ‘As i said, it’s okay i’m fine.’ ‘I was trying to be funny.’ ‘I know’ ‘please. I didn’t mean to hurt you.’ ‘I know…’ ‘…did i make you sad?’ ‘…..no….’ You could see him clench his jaw before he stood up and went to the balcony. He somehow forgot to either close the curtains or forgot that the balcony was made from see through glass. Because the next 10 minutes you could see him scream out his lungs and fight himself, both verbally and physically. It was pretty funny to see since you couldn’t hear anything because the glass was soundproof, only a tweaking pink james on the balcony.
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That’s it yall thank yall for reading🫶
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suckerfordylansstuff · 3 months ago
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Not a date - Steve Harrington
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Pairing: Steve Harrington x Henderson!reader
Summary: Dustin is certain you're dating someone. You, on the other hand, are not so sure.
Word count: 2.5k
Notes: As you can see we're changing the style with this new post. You could consider this kind of a small prequel for "A date like no other", but mostly, I just wanted to write more of Dustin and Y/n's relationship (more will follow, inspiration has hit me). Plus, it was fun playing detective. Hope you enjoy! 💕
!This piece goes along my Steve Harrington series "New Journey", but can also be read as a standalone!
Timeline: After the winter dance, but before their first date.
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“I have gathered you here today on an important issue.” Dustin was pacing around Mike's basement while all the rest of his friends followed him with their eyes “It is crucial that we take upon this matter with focus and determination. Not to mention stealthiness since a bit of spy work is going to occur.”
“Dustin, why are we here?” his dramatics had Max over the whole thing very quickly.
“It has come to my attention that my sister, my own blood, has been seeing someone behind my back and simultaneously lying to me about it.”
“And?” Lucas asked, not understanding his friend’s anger.
“What do you mean and? This is it!”
“You’re mad your sister has finally found someone?” Will was trying to understand Dustin’s motives.
“I’m mad she hasn’t told me about it. I mean, why would she do that? I certainly tell her everything.” his pacing hasn’t stopped from the moment he entered the basement.
“Maybe because she wants to focus on the new relationship and not on her little brother’s obnoxious opinions?” Max told him with a smile, making Dustin stop in his tracks.
“You’re new, you don’t get a say.” he pointed in her direction and continued his pattern on the floor.
“Dustin, what do you want us to do?” Mike sighed when he saw Dustin place large papers on top of a chair, opposite to them, a pen in his hand as he settled beside them. It reminded him of their teacher, and not in a good way.
“I want you to come with me and spy on her.” he removed his first blank paper, revealing a calendar with colorful dots on certain days “It all started a month ago. I realized she began going out a lot more than usual. I mean I love my sister, but let’s be honest, she doesn’t have many friends.” he pulled out another paper, this time a pie chart with all the colors they had previously seen on the calendar “So, I began tracking her behavior. When she would go out, when she would return, and try to figure out with whom. So far, I’ve noted 14 outings in the span of 29 days… She went out with Jonathan twice, once with Nancy, once with you, Max, and you, Eleven, for girl’s night. Three times with all of us and another three with me. That all makes 10. The other 4 are a mystery to me.” with each sentence, each ‘clue’, he was pointing the pen at every chart so the rest wouldn’t get lost
“When she hangs out with friends, I have noticed Y/n coming back at a decent hour, say around 10:30, at least 11:00. However, when she’s ‘on her own’ those hours defer.” the new paper showed the said hours with a big question mark at the end “I have caught her sneaking into the house well after 1:00 am! Clearly, she’s not out there on her own. But I haven’t been able to figure out with whom. I checked with both Nancy and Jonathan telling me that they had not seen her those specific days. She’s clearly with someone doing something, but when I ask her about what she did and where she went she outright lies to me, saying she was with Jonathan and/or Nancy.” he let the last paper fall flat on the chair, the pen rhythmically hitting his other palm “It is our mission to figure out who she is meeting on these days, so I can evaluate if I need to step in and help her.”
The kids all looked at one another, trying to see if they wanted in on this. His thinking could be correct, but the thought of him being wrong and giving them the chance to mess with him is what sealed the deal.
“Alright, we’re in.” Mike announced for all of them. Dustin’s face immediately lit up.
“But how do we know when their next meet-up is?” Lucas asked him.
“Already ahead of you my friend.” he began organizing the papers he had used, stacking them into his bag before putting it on “I overheard Y/n talk with my mother, saying she’s going out. Again, wouldn’t outright tell me with whom. So that’s why I came here, to find out if Nancy had any plans. As it turns out she did. But not with my sister, with Jonathan. Right?” his eyes fell on Will.
“Yeah, they are hanging out at ours.” Will confirmed Dustin’s words.
“Okay, so that excludes them from this ‘secret meet up’.” Max thought out loud.
“Precisely.” they were now getting out of the house from the basement’s door, making their way to their bikes.
“So… Where is she?” Eleven asked, her small voice was now loud enough for all to hear, turning their heads at once to look at Dustin.
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Dustin wasn’t sure at the beginning where his sister would be. She had mentioned she would leave around 8:30. Now, he had left earlier to check on her small lie at the Wheeler’s, so their first stop was at his house to check if her car was still there. It was, which meant either of two things. She either walked to their meeting place (which was unlikely of her after everything that had happened to them, walking somewhere alone was a no-no for his sister). Or the person she was meeting picked her up. It left a lot of options open so he decided to head inside with the rest and look for more clues.
His mom greeted them, chatting a bit with the kids while Dustin looked around for any indication as to where she went. He noticed that her sneakers were missing, telling Dustin that they weren’t going somewhere fancy, so maybe their destination was the theater or maybe grabbing a bite somewhere.
“Hey, mom. I was thinking of eating the leftover pizza from last night after I come back. Y/n didn’t eat it, right?” he looked over at his mom, Tews on her lap as always.
“Oh, no, Dusty, she specifically said that she didn’t want to have anything since she’ll be going out to eat with her friends.”
Bingo.
Dustin excluded from the options list the diner where you used to work. Too many people knew you there and the secrecy wouldn’t last. So, they began roaming around the town trying to get a glimpse of you. They succeeded after a couple of tries. Lucas had caught a glimpse of your figure inside the burger place. You were sitting in a corner booth in the back of the store, your face bright, not only by the lights of the place but by your present company as well.
“Holy shit. Dustin was right.” Max climbed out of her bike, staring at the older sister of her new friend.
“Of course I was. Can you see who she is with?”
“No, his back is turned.” Lucas tried to wiggle around in an attempt to see who was with you. They couldn’t go  
We’re gonna have to get inside.” Mike noted and Dustin agreed.
“Not all of us, we’ll draw attention. Will, you’re coming with me.” the said boy wasted no time and followed his friend toward the entryway.
“Why him?” Mike called out, annoyed he wasn’t getting in on the action.
“Because he’ll be quiet, unlike you.” Dustin whisper-yelled.
They get inside and make their way to the end of the front counter. When they peaked at the back, they had a clearer shot at the two figures. Dustin could clearly see your big, bright smile, but the guy you were with was sitting opposite of you, meaning they could only see his back
“We still can’t see his face.”
“Wait… I know that hair.” Dustin’s eyes squinted as he focused on the person in question. The waiter had approached them, his lips moving, probably asking them if everything was okay. It was then when the mysterious guy turned his head, making him visible to him, a relieved sigh falling from his lips  “Oh, it’s just Steve.”
He and Will went outside without alerting you, joining the others once again.
“Okay, people, crisis averted. It was only Steve, just a friendly meet-up.” he announced to his friends before he grabbed his bike, ready to return home.
“Sure.” Max smirked his way, suddenly making a frown appear on Dustin’s face.
“Uh… Dustin? I don’t think this is very friend-like.” Mike was pointing to the restaurant. Dustin turned and met the horror. Steve had now switched his seat, joining you on your side. His arm was around your shoulders, your faces way too close for his liking. And then it happened. Steve kissed you.
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Dustin was waiting for you to return back home. He was in the dark, his mother fast asleep, not realizing her own son was stewing hot. He was ready. Ready to tell you he knows your secret and ready to express his anger. He liked Steve, he didn’t like showing it, but he did. He was funny and honest with him, and a guy. He had a guy friend. Someone whom he could rely on when seeking advice. He knew he could come to you about everything, but sometimes he felt too embarrassed to say certain things. He was getting older, more ‘mature’ as his mother had said, and Steve had been through those things before, therefore could give him the advice he needed.
He liked Steve, but now he was afraid he was going to lose him… and you. You always wanted to be in a relationship and now that you were in one, you were going to spend all your time with each other, forgetting all about the party and mainly him. Or you would eventually break up and he would have to choose your side, his sister’s, and forcing him to say goodbye to his friend.
It all felt unacceptable to him, so he had to tell you about it.
Finally, he heard a car stop outside. After a couple of minutes, your keys were daggling as you opened the door. He watched you come inside, a lingering smile on your face as you took off your jacket and placed it on the hook beside the door. You were in the process of taking off your shoes when he decided to intervene.
“Hello, sister.”
He startled you, a small yelp coming from your lips as you squinted your eyes to see where your brother was hiding “Dustin? What are you doing in the dark? Do you know what time it is?”
“Do you?” he countered back, catching you by surprise
“What?”
“How was your night?”
“Oh… It was really fun actually, thanks for asking. But this still doesn’t answer my question as to what you’re still doing up.” your arms were now folded in front of your chest, thinking you had the upper hand here.
“Oh, I just had a simple question really. Who were you with?”
It took you a second to form your question, confusion rising inside you “What?”
“I was over at Mike’s today and I stumbled upon Nancy.” Dustin stood up from the armchair and walked closer to you as he explained “I asked her if she was on her way to come get you, but she told me she wasn’t meeting with you. She was actually going to meet up with Jonathan for a date at his place.”
“Oh…” was all that came from your lips.
“I know who you met tonight. I followed you and found out you are secretly dating Steve.” his finger was accusingly pointing at your figure. He didn’t know what reaction he was really expecting from you but it certainly wasn’t what you said next.
“I’m not dating him, Dustin.”
“Wait, what?”
“We’re not dating.” you shrugged your shoulders and sat down on the couch.
“But he kissed you. I saw it!”
“I don’t know what to tell you, okay? It’s all very confusing.” your head your resting on top of your palms. You looked defeated, confused, sad, a whole different side of you than the one he had seen at the restaurant. He slowly approached you, sitting next to you. You looked up and saw him looking at you, a silent invitation to explain “It all started after we dropped you off at the ball. We happened to dance a little and it ended in a kiss. After that, we’ve been hanging out as much as we could and, yes, I admit, some kissing has gone down, but I don’t know what we are.”
Dustin noted that your voice was small but your feeling big “Do you like him?”
You looked up and locked eyes with your brother. You hadn’t been able to tell no one this, and you had no idea how much it was eating at you to get it out before this conversation “Very much.”
“Then I’m certain it will all work out.”
And just like that Dustin had forgotten all about his speech. He could still remember the way you smiled at him, thanking him with a big hug. It was the same smile when you picked up the phone, a couple of days later, Steve’s name falling from your lips. It was a soft one, your focus entirely on the voice coming from the phone, from his friend. When you finally hung up, a small shriek sounded all around the room. After just a moment he found out you were excited, beyond excited because he had asked you out on a date.
“Didn’t you go on one like yesterday?” he had asked.
“This is the first time he uses the word date, Dustin. The first time!”
He secretly smiled at your antics, even if in front of you he called it gross. When you returned home after that so-called ‘first date’, bliss was written all over your face. The next day, you all were meeting with the party for a campaign, the first time you would include Steve in your game. The first time he would see you two together officially for the first time. It was funny seeing him make all the wrong decisions and getting himself killed in the first thirty minutes. It was hilarious seeing you and him bicker about what you should do next. Steve making it his business to judge you all based on your actions. And it was certainly sweet when he would cheer with you after a successful roll. It didn’t seem all that different to him; your behavior.
It was after the campaign when Steve was talking his ear off on the way to their house about what movie you should see at the next movie night with the kids, that it truly hit him. Nothing would change. You would still be his sister and Steve would still be his friend. It couldn’t be that bad. Especially, if he saw his sister so happy every day.
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moonlit-imagines · 6 months ago
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Headcanons for being ex-HYDRA and Bucky being your mentor
Bucky Barnes x teen!reader
warnings:
a/n:
prompt: @marvelflame2010: “Hello, can you write headcanons for Bucky Barnes being a mentor to a teenager (around 15-16) that was ex-HYDRA and is trying to be a hero? read your request rules, so I hope that this is proper. Thank you!”
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sometimes it felt like no one knew what you had went through, being abducted and forced to be a weapon for a secret organization whose purpose was to gain more control
but when you met these avengers, it felt like everyone and their momma knew what it was like
bucky barnes, for example
the winter soldier, a WWII soldier deemed missing in action, presumed dead, and happened to be a prisoner of war and beyond
the experimentation and mind control he endured was much like your own, which gave you some comfort
“does it ever feel weird hearing one of your trigger words as a civilian? you know, now that we got ‘reset?’” -you
“not…no, not really? who’s speaking russian around you, y/n?” -bucky
“uh…i mean, no one. i’ve just been watching a lot of russian tv recently” -you
“why would you naturally assume i am also doing that?” -bucky
“why did you assume i didn’t?” -you
ok, thats not the greatest example of bucky mentoring you, but it’s a great example of sarcastic bickering!
honestly, the hardest part was learning how to be gentle again
if you could even say you were ever gentle to begin with being taken so young
it was hard to be so ruthless and unfeeling and have to start feeling
the nights of panic and anxiety were the worst, they made you wish you had that switch in your mind still. you’d whispered the trigger words to yourself sometimes to see if they were still there and if they could “help” you turn off those feelings
but bucky knew. he knew and he learned and he stuck with you
“y/n, those feelings are good” -buck
“no! no, they’re not. why are you saying it’s good to feel bad? i can’t breathe! i can’t think!” -you
“because you have feelings now. it’s the same as when you’re happy. you get to feel happy, it comes with all that other stuff. you have options, opportunities, this is one of them. you just have to take deep breaths” -bucky
combat training was the strangest feeling
“nope. too hard” “pulling your punches now” “your aim there was lethal” “you can’t put that much force into a chokehold” “cutting someone’s finger off isnt cool, y/n. kind of a dick move” “you automatically try to inflict severe injuries, arteries should not be the go-to. disarm your enemy first, if anything”
nothing ever felt right
if you were fighting effectively, you’d risk killing someone, which isn’t what you do anymore
if you held back too much, you’d be injured or killed, and all this would be for nothing
there had to be a sweet spot, but it was never what you were trained for. you were trained to eliminate your targets by any means
but you understood bucky all the same
bucky was there to help you acclimate to the norm too
like, whatever that was
says the guy with the metal arm and fought in world war ii despite the fact it was now like. 2020-something
like a normal ass dinner
“you know, i rarely ever got to go out to eat as a kid” -bucky
“can you ever say something that doesn’t make you sound ancient?” -you
“hey, you wanna pay for your meal tonight or do you want me to?” -bucky
“sorry…” -you
you liked to watch dumb tv shows (the american kind) with him
he’d indulge for a few minutes and then walk off unless he was REALLY interested
actually, he really enjoyed the office
“which avenger would each character be?” -you
“don’t…don’t make me do that” -bucky
“come on! you know, i kind of think phyllis and bruce are alike. like, theyre soft until they get mad and then all bets are off” -you
“that is…dumb” -bucky
sam really loved that bucky was there for you
but he saw that bucky was kind of doing it to distract himself too
“you know, me and steve found bucky just minding his business a while back. all he wanted then was to be alone, mind his business. this? this was what he needed” -sam
“what? a teenage hydra defector?” -you
“i mean, if youre gonna put it that way” -sam
“no, i get what youre saying” -you
steve actually didn’t come up too much, you know?
you thought bucky was trying to keep himself in the present as much as he could
which was what you were trying to learn from him in the end. how to move forward
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princessmisery666 · 9 months ago
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Just Say You Love Me
Summary: Dean is trying to embrace his emotions and look to the future. Part 3 of 3. Part 2 - The Right Guy On Paper.
Warnings/Genres/Troupes: fluff, mentions of cheating. 
W/C: 4,901.
Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Mentioned: Jody Mills. 
Pairing: Dean x fem!reader (you - no descriptions of body type or ethnicity).
Bingo: @jacklesversebingo Square Filled: ”Would you please, shut up, I’m trying to confess my love for you.”
A/N: Obviously this was supposed to posted on a certain day (you'll get what I mean when you read) but it just wasn't where I wanted it to be at the time so I waited. Two-ish weeks later ain't bad though.
Graphics: made by be on canva. Dividers by @talesmaniac89
Master Lists: JAcklesVerseBingo / Dean Winchester / Main
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Pulling off the highway, Dean grumbles, “This is stupid,” to himself again. Yet, he had called Jody to make sure you weren’t working, made the two-hour drive, and hadn't veered off route to the nearest bar.
It’s been a few weeks since he saw you at Jody’s cabin. You’ve spoken on the phone a few times and met him halfway to Kentucky to give him a lore book Claire had borrowed. But no in-depth conversations have been had, which he’s okay with because one, it’s a conversation to be had in person and not while he is neck deep in a case, and B, he doesn’t know what to say or how to tell you what he wants because he’s still not sure himself. 
So, in the safe confines of Baby, he asks himself again why is he driving to your house on Unattached Drifter Christmas or ‘Valentine’s Day’ for the schmucks? 
Before he can do a little soul-searching and find the answer, his cell phone rings. 
“Hey Sam, what’s up?” he answers. 
“Why are you in Sioux Falls? Something wrong?” 
“Everything’s fine. Wait, how do you know where I am?” 
“You were way too vague about where you were going. You always have a plan for today,” Sam explains, “figured you were up to no good and better keep an eye on you in case you get into trouble like last time.”
“Last time was almost five years ago, and for the hundredth time, I didn’t know she was married,” Dean snarks.
“Plus, you didn’t turn off your GPS,” Sam says as if he hadn’t heard Dean’s argument. “So why are you in Sioux Falls on Unattached Drifter Christmas?”
He falters for a second, thinking of an excuse, and before his pause becomes suspicious, he blurts, “There’s a new bar opened up. Wanna try it out.”
“This bar called Y/N’s, by any chance?” 
“What? No!”
Sam laughs, and that all-knowing chuckle reminds Dean that Sam is onto him and there’s no point in denying anything. “It’s a good thing, Dean,” his brother assures him. “You may not have told her outright, but she’s smart. She’ll recognize you showing up today, of all days, is your way of telling her you want…” Dean waits, hoping that Sam will impart the answer that eludes him, but huffs in defeat when his brother adds, “Whatever it is you want.”
“This is stupid,” Dean grumbles, “I’m being stupid.” 
“No, it's not,” Sam scolds. “I’m sure today will be tough for her. So, just being there for her is a good thing. It doesn’t have to be deep conversations. Showing up and supporting her is enough.”
Dean considers that Sam is probably right, but it doesn’t make him feel any less insecure. “Maybe.”
“Have fun,” Sam says before hanging up.
Five minutes from his final destination, his phone chimes, alerting him to a text message.
Jody: She’s at Lucky Shots, fifth wheeling it. 
“Dammit, Sam!” he snarls, but he’s not really mad, saves him a trip to her empty house.
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The break at Jody’s cabin was revitalizing, and the feeling has stuck for the few weeks you’ve been back in your routine. It probably helps that you removed every trace of Luke from your life the moment you got home. The confrontation with Dean was cathartic, too. You’ve analyzed what he’d said about not wanting you to meet someone new and that he missed you, and asked Jody for her opinion, too. She’d wistfully smiled as if aware of something you weren’t, “Maybe you gave up on him too quickly.”
You didn’t want to admit that Jody was probably right. Yet you had made assumptions, choosing to believe that he didn’t want anything serious, and after admitting to yourself that you wanted something more, you had decided to go out and find it somewhere else.
That realization turned out to be at the forefront of your mind today. You're thankful to your friends, Laura and Sara, for the invitation and for not allowing you to stay home and eat your emotions. Being the fifth wheel isn’t the issue. It doesn’t bother you, even on Valentine’s Day. They chose a lowkey, casual games bar, not some romantic, candlelit restaurant, and for that, you are eternally grateful. The issue is Luke is there. It could be worse. He could be with her, but fortunately, he’s with two of his buddies.
The bar has darts, beer pong, pool, skee ball, knock down a clown, and a few other amusements. You're locked into a tight game of girls versus boys beer pong - the beer having been replaced with tequila shots - and you can feel Luke’s every glance as if he’s waiting for an opportunity to approach.
It’s the last thing you want, and your friends were kind enough to offer to leave when he arrived, but you stubbornly refused. You had no reason to leave. He should be filled with so much shame and regret that he can’t bear to face you, but he has the audacity to look like a wounded puppy, and that makes you angry. 
The game is down to the wire, and the final ball is down to Chris and Dylan, your friends' partners. Dylan massages Chris’ shoulders, “Come on, buddy, you got this. For the win!” 
You all hold your breath as Chris releases the ball, and the boys celebrate the victory with loud cheers as it lands in the cup, having barely touched the sides. You, Laura, and Sara shoot another round of tequila. The sourness of the lemon you suck on adds to the disapproving look you catch Luke throwing your way.
Asshole. How dare he judge you! 
“I demand a rematch!” Laura declares. 
You agree. “My turn to buy the drinks.”
Sara escorts you to the bar. Though she masks it as helping you carry the drinks back to the table, you know she’s doing it to protect you from an unwanted visitor.
“I need the bathroom, but I’ll meet you back here,” Sara tells you, “if he comes over before I make it back, stomp on his foot and poke him in the eye.” 
You laugh, really belly laugh, because she’s totally serious, and it’s also hilarious to think he’d have the balls to actually approach you.
“Who’re we looking out for, honey?” the elderly woman beside you asks, lips pursed and looking sassy. 
Sara tells her, “Other end of the bar, tall white guy, blond hair.”
“Green shirt?” she asks for confirmation. 
“That’s the one.” 
“Uh-huh,” she tuts, “I know the type, handsome as an angel, spirit of the devil. You go on to the bathroom. I’ve got your friend until you get back.”
You don’t doubt the lady’s confidence. You wouldn’t mess with her. 
“Thank you, Miss…” 
“Call me Beverly,” she introduces, and Sara shakes her hand before skittering off to the bathroom. 
You wait your turn to be served, listening to your protector tell you all about her first husband, “the devil incarnate.” 
If only she knew. 
You face forward, not even side-glancing in Luke’s direction, not wanting to give him any inclination you may want to talk. You don’t. Beverly turns and rests her back against the bar to see the whole room without looking over her shoulder. 
“Oh, sweetie,” your new friend says, “there’s another one of those handsome-as-an-angel men walking this way, and I think he’s looking for you.” 
You still don’t turn, but look up into the mirror behind the bar and see him. Dean maneuvering around people and tables, coming straight toward you. 
Unintentionally, you gasp, a sheepish smile creeping in as you lock eyes with him in the mirror.
“From that reaction, I don’t think you need help with this one,” Beverly says, sweetly taking a step to the left to make room for Dean. 
“Hey,” he says, a half smile making him look a little awkward.  
“Hey,” you say as he leans in to kiss your cheek, and when he’s close, you whisper, “Everything okay?” 
He pulls back, nodding with a slight frown as if the question was offensive or something. “Yeah, everything is fine, just passing through and wanted to say hi.”
“Passing through?” you ask, suspicion clear in your tone.
His frown deepens, clearly trying to sell the lie, pretending to be confused by the suspicion.
You smirk. “Just happen to be passing through on Unattached Drifter Christmas?”
He rolls his eyes and shakes his head. “How much do you and Sam talk?” 
“A lot,” you confess, “emails, phone calls, memes, and then there’s the weekly newsletter.” 
“Busted.” He laughs, and it shakes off whatever anxiety he was feeling.
The bartender comes over and takes your order. You add on whatever Beverly is drinking for the rest of the night, which reminds you Sara has been gone a while. You turn around to look for her, and Dean looks over his shoulder. Sara’s back at the table. All of them are staring at you but quickly and comically turn around as if they weren’t when Dean finds them. 
“Sorry,” you chuckle, “they’re just looking out for me cause Deputy Dick is here.”
“Shit,” he grumbles. “Is me being here going to be a problem?”
“Probably, but that's his problem.”
Dean laughs, and you really have missed it. The easy relationship you had seems to be a thing of the past, but you want it back. Maybe not the sex because you’ve realized that's where the problem lies. You want more from him than you'll ever get, but at least the friendship could be mended.
“But don’t waste your Christmas on me, Dean,” you say. It's subtle but enough to tell him that hooking up is off the table.
That disgruntled frown appears again, and he looks genuinely offended. “I’m not here ‘cause I think I’m gonna get laid.” He explains, shrugging. “Running into you isn’t a coincidence. I was on my way to your place because I didn’t want you to be alone tonight. Jody told me where you were.”
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to take from that?”
“Take it for what it is,” Dean suggests. “I’m trying.”
You can work with that. Trying to be friends sounds like just what you need. No pressure or expectations from either side, so you quickly squash the thought that it means something deeper that he’s choosing to spend time with you instead of finding a warm body to lie with. 
“Okay.” You smile, trying to look as sweet as possible. “Well, can part of that trying be helping us win at beer pong?” 
“Girls versus boys?”
“Obviously.”
He scoffs, “Absolutely not! And you get an extra shot for asking me to rig a sacred game.” He hands you a shot off the tray of drinks, and you knock it back. 
He watches you, grinning the whole time, and you shake your head as if it will shake away the taste. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” he says, leaning down to kiss your cheek.
“Don’t try and soften me up, Winchester,” you warn, “I’m not gonna take it easy on you.” 
He shrugs, “Was worth a shot,” and walks away with the tray of drinks. 
Chris and Dylan merrily call his name as he approaches, and you follow, smiling fondly. 
“Now the odds are even. Prepare to go down, ladies,” Dean says, taking off his jacket and rolling up the sleeves of his shirt to his elbow.
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The games continued; the boys won at Beer Pong, but the girls won two rounds of darts. Once Chris and Dylan had gushed over the Impala, you said your goodbyes in the parking lot. Each of your friends hugged you. Dean got a kiss on the cheek from the ladies, and the guys gave him a firm handshake before pulling each other into a one-armed hug. It looked natural and easy, and you love how well Dean slots into the group.
You realize you’re staring as he drives, and he glances over when he feels your eyes on him. “Are we still social distancing or something?” he jokes, reaching a hand over to tug on your leg, requesting you get closer. 
You oblige, sliding over the leather seat, and he slips an arm behind your shoulders to rest on the seat back. “Thank you for that,” you say, kissing his cheek.
“For what?” he asks. 
“Pretending like you couldn’t hit that bullseye with your eyes closed.”
“Well, I’m supposed to be a mechanic, right? Not sure a mechanic would have perfect marksmanship.”
“If you’re not sold on the mechanic thing, you can always tell them you’ve changed your profession,” you suggest, and with a teasing wink, add, “but they all already know you’re good with your hands.” 
“Would you, for once, get your mind out of the gutter?” Dean jests, “I already told you, no sex for you.”
“Sorry, Mr Winchester, sir,” you joke, “I’ll be on my best behavior.” 
He laughs but looks out at the road. His fingers lightly brush your neck. You aren’t sure he realizes he’s doing it. When you were sleeping together, it became a thing - absentmindedly, he’d lightly stroke your skin while watching a movie or falling asleep. It's familiar and comforting, and you lay your head on his shoulder the rest of the ride home. 
Dean follows you up your path, and while you search your bag for your keys, you notice him looking to the left, eyes squinting, trying to see something too far away. 
“Wanna come in?” you ask, distracting him from whatever has caught his attention.
“It’s not a good idea,” he says, giving you his full focus, “I meant what I said, Y/N. I didn’t show up cause I was expecting to get laid.” 
You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t considered throwing caution to the wind and jumping into old habits. And you're surprised by Dean’s rejection. He could have followed your lead and taken you to bed without any objections.
“Presumptuous much?” you counter, smirking. 
He smiles, all charm and smug joy, because he knows he’s right. “Don’t try and pretend you weren’t thinking about it.” He steps closer, crowding your space and gripping your hips to pull you against him. “You’ve been flirting with me all night.” 
“I can stop,” you threaten, but it falls flat as you wrap your arms around his neck.
He grins, “No, you can’t,” against your lips, kissing you before you can claim otherwise.
The kiss is not hesitant; it’s deep and long, but you feel him holding back. His hands don’t roam, remaining wrapped around your waist, but he takes his time, savoring the shared warmth, each brush of your tongues, every breath shared. 
Dean is the first to pull back. “I gotta go,” he swiftly kisses you again. “I told Jody I’d be there before midnight.” 
“Gonna turn into a pumpkin, Winchester?”
He laughs, pecking your lips again, but then his features soften, something close to pleading, “I’m trying,” he grumbles, but you're not sure if it's to remind you or himself.
He doesn’t say exactly what it is that he’s trying, but you know he means he’s trying to do things the right way, and that’s enough. “You're doing great,” you assure. 
He kisses you harder, tongue sweeping over your bottom lip, and you let him in. He walks you backward until your back hits your door, and he groans when he presses himself into you. “Nope,” he scolds himself, pulling back and comically jogging away down the path, but while you're still laughing at him, he turns back. “Can I take you to breakfast tomorrow?”
You smile, and it widens to a knowing grin. You spare him the OMG shock when the realization hits you, but you do ask, “Are we dating?” 
“Only if you say yes?”
“Pick me up at ten.”
He winks, unable to contain the boyish grin, and just as he opens his mouth to say something, a siren blasts, and a sheriff’s car pulls up to Baby’s bumper.
You walk a few feet to stand beside Dean as Travis, the rookie, and Luke, in plain clothes, step out of the vehicle. 
“You gotta be kidding me,” Dean says.
Luke and Travis stand beside each other on the sidewalk but don’t approach you.
“Ten out of ten for dramatic flair,” you snark, clapping once. 
“But should have done it while I was kissing her,” Dean adds, “would have been way more dramatic.”
“I think you meant douchier,” you suggest with a confused frown. 
“You’re right,” Dean clicks his fingers as if you're right on the money, “I meant douchier.”
“Funny,” Luke says. “Travis, this man has been driving under the influence. Please breathalyze him.”
You put a hand on Dean’s arm to keep him in place should he decide Luke deserves another punch to the face. After all, he’s not in uniform. Travis is wise enough not to move. You're his boss. Luke has seniority over him but not over you. 
“Really?” Dean sneers. “That's all you got?”
“Go home, Luke,” you tell him, “you’re making a fool of yourself.”
“So what if I am,” he says, “I just wanna talk.” 
“We’ve talked,” you remind him. “You talked, I listened to your piss poor excuses, and it changed nothing.” 
“We were going to get married.”
You raise your voice, “That was a reaction to your cheating! You only asked me because you felt guilty, and I only said yes because…” you cut yourself off, but Dean looks at you, knowing what you had been about to say.
“We were good together,” Luke says, seemingly oblivious to the silent conversation that passed between you and Dean. “He’s just a,” Luke sneers at Dean. “What did you call it? A situationship.”
Dean tenses under your grip, and you know the comment had the intended effect. You’ll have to address it later.
Clenching his jaw, he briefly looks away before leveling a glare and taunting, “Dude, have some dignity. She’s already told you it’s over.” He practically growls his next words. “So leave.”
Luke ignores Dean, looking directly at you. “You're angry, I get it. But don’t make any rash decisions, please.” he implores.
“I was angry,” you agree, “I was furious, but now I’m indifferent. You were a rash decision, Luke, and I’m not saying that to be cruel or get back at you. It’s the truth.”
Saying those words aloud drives home your previous thoughts of why you started dating Luke. Getting engaged was a reaction to your feelings of rejection from Dean’s honesty about commitment. You release a breath as Luke’s face drops, finally seeming to understand.
“I’m sorry,” you say.
He shakes his head, blasting out a breath filled with disbelief. “We were never going to work out,” Luke realizes aloud, “you were too hung up on him.”
“Travis, I’m sorry you were dragged into this,” you sigh, “but please take Luke home.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Luke stares for a second longer, but chooses not to say anything further, allowing Travis to usher him into the car.
Dean doesn’t move, watching the car disappear from view at the end of the street. Your heart pounds in your chest; you’ve just gotten to a good place, and now that might have all been unraveled.
Though you suspect not a lot of it is surprising to Dean. The day you told him about Luke, he’d begged you not to tell him you loved him and he was right for the assumption that you did - or do or might. You can not say it even reject the idea if anyone suggests it, but you can’t deny it to yourself. You sought out Luke to replace the emotions you felt weren’t reciprocated by Dean.
“Maybe I should take you to breakfast,” you suggest, with a nervous chuckle, “to make up for that. I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head, giving you a small smile. “Nothing to be sorry for,” he assures you, but he’s looking you over like he’s trying to read the emotions behind the words. “You okay?”
Quickly, you reply, “Yeah, of course.”
“You sure? You look like a bit of ‘deer caught in headlights’.” 
“I’m okay,” you sigh, taking a deep breath. “Just a little worried that's undone all the progress we’ve made.”
“It hasn’t,” he tells you, slipping a hand on your hip and pulling you into him. “This situationship can handle an ex-situationship.”
You grimace, “I’m sorry.”
He laughs, nonplussed, “Don’t be. I’ve been called worse.” 
He silences your next apology with a deep kiss and slowly, seemingly reluctantly, pulls back. “I’ll pick you up at ten for breakfast.”
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You're rambling again. Since Valentine’s Day, it’s been happening a lot. Dean knows why you're doing it. He can see it in your expression every time you catch yourself and stutter over the words, changing it to something else and hoping he doesn’t notice. 
The first time it happened, a few weeks ago, Dean thought he misheard you. You were both breathing heavily, your thighs pressed against his ears, holding him in place, writhing while you rode his tongue. He watched your face as much as he could, eyes rolling to the back of your head. Your body twitched, and your climax coated his tongue and wet the sheets, “I love yo…when you do that.”
Three days ago, after a double date with Sara and Dylan, Dean woke you up in bed with coffee and French toast. Still in the haze of sleep, you smiled contentedly, and it almost slipped out. “I love…” you coughed to cut yourself off, correcting it as you sat up, “I love French toast.” But he could see it in eyes, the adoration tainted with the fear of saying it aloud.
‘I love you’ is on the tip of your tongue, and it almost escaped a moment ago. 
A car accident had kept you late at work, so the dinner reservations had to be canceled, but Dean wouldn’t let it ruin the night. He’d ordered pizza, knowing you’d be starving when you got home, run a bubble bath (with the ulterior motive of joining you), popped open a bottle of your favorite wine - he hated it, thought it tasted like vinegar - and was waiting in the middle of the living room for you with the glass in hand. 
Taking the glass from him, you lazily kissed him. He could feel how tired you were. Listlessly, you mumbled, “Oh god, I love yo…” but had stifled it so quickly that the rim of the glass clinked against your teeth.
Clearly unable to think of an alternative, you began rambling about your day while unnecessarily blitzing around the already clean kitchen with a dishcloth.
He wants you to say it. He figured out how he felt about you when it finally sunk in after you’d told him you’d met someone else. It was more than physical, and it always had been. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have hurt so damn much when you told him about Luke.
He hasn’t said the words to you, but you have to know that’s how he feels. He told you he’s trying. Although, there haven’t been any conversations about exactly what that entails. He’s been more communicative. He’s made future plans - okay, only a week or so ahead at any given time, but that tells you all you need to know, right?
But the way you keep avoiding the phrase sets off a little ripple in his heart. Maybe you don’t know. Maybe you’re afraid he’ll hightail it out the door like last time if you say it aloud. Maybe he needs to expand his communication skills. He says your name softly, but you either don’t hear him or pretend not to, afraid of what comes after.
“I should get you a key cut,” you blabber in. “Save you having to pick the lock next time I’m not home. Don’t want the neighbors calling it in. Mrs Brooks next door is always twitching her curtains.”
He tries again, “Y/N,” louder this time. 
“I need to put a load of laundry in,” you say, striding into the laundry room. 
“I did it already,” he calls after you. 
“I’ll put it in the dryer then.” 
He follows, trapping you inside the smaller space so you have no choice but to turn and face him.
“The laundry is done and folded in the basket in your room.” he continues, speaking to your back. “The kitchen is clean. Pizza is on the way. The bath should still be hot.” 
You finally look up at him, and there’s that apprehensive smile again, but your eyes are aglow with the words you chew your lip to suppress. 
“Just say it,” he sighs, trying to hide his smile. 
“Say what?” 
He steps closer, crowding your space and using a gentle touch to tilt your head up to keep your eyes on his. “You know what.” He smirks, teasing, “You can’t bite your tongue forever. So just say you love me.”
“I wasn’t biting…” you stammer, “I never…I only meant I was going to get a key cut for you. I didn’t mean anything….” 
“Would you please, shut up?” He silences your rambling with a hard kiss, grabbing your hips and hoisting you to sit on top of the dryer. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you sigh placidly, but he pulls back and grins, “I’m trying to confess my love for you.”
You drop your gaze, avoiding eye contact. “Please don’t.” 
He notes your avoidance of looking at him, and panic sets in that maybe he’s got it wrong, again. But he hopes he’s right, so he chuckles, “giving me a taste of my own medicine.” 
You shake your head, “No. I don’t need to hear it, and you don’t have to say it ‘cause you think it's what I want to hear.” 
“That’s not what…” he tries, but you raise your voice to speak over him. 
“Dean, please!” you wait for him to close his mouth. “I like how things are now, and I don’t want to jinx it or have to watch your ass run for the door again.” 
“I’m not going anywhere,” he promises, “it will be different this time.”
“We’ve been through this already. I don’t want promises, and we don’t need to open old wounds.”
“I get why you’re…”
The doorbell interrupts him, and you use the excuse to push him aside as you jump down and scurry out of the room.
He leans against the doorframe facing into the kitchen and listens to you thank the delivery guy. You must have given a generous tip because he thanks you multiple times as you say goodbye to him.
The click of the door closing echoes, and he waits for you to appear, but you don’t. He imagines you standing in the hallway, trying to calm yourself. 
He waits, counting the seconds in his head with the promise that he’ll go find you if he reaches thirty.
At fifteen, you enter, eyes glued to the floor, pizza balanced like a cocktail waitress. “I’m gonna go take that bath,” you tell him. “Hopefully, it's still warm.” 
You’re assuming the conversation is over. Only it isn’t. At least, not for him. He hasn’t been working up to it. He’s never had a grand plan for the first time he says it, but now he knows he needs to say it so you understand and believe him.
Silently, he watches you put a few slices of pizza on a plate - so he presumes he’s not invited to the bubble bath. The stopper gives an audible pop when you pull it from the wine bottle, like an exclamation point on his thoughts.
He clears his throat and proclaims, “I love you.”
The only indication that you heard him is your frozen state, bottle tipped, ready to pour into your glass. 
“It took me too long to figure that out, but I do. And saying it or not saying it out loud isn’t going to change a damn thing.”
You continue to pour the wine into your glass but don’t turn to face him, recorking the bottle and resting against the countertop.
You haven’t run away, so he continues, “I always knew we were good together, but now I see that we have a whole future of being good together, not just the here and now.”
Hesitantly, he stalks closer to you, watching you take a large gulp of the red liquid. You must hear his approach because you turn around but jump slightly at his proximity. 
“I’m ready to move forward,” he confesses, “and I want to do it with you.” 
“Are you done?” you ask, finally looking up at him with a teasing but joyful smirk under a shy gaze. “You’re on a roll there. I just want to be sure before I say anything.” 
He laughs but shakes his head once, “Nope.” He takes the glass from your hand and puts it beside the bottle. “One more thing,” he leans in closer, tilting your chin up, lips whispering over yours, “I love you.”
You chase his lips as he pulls back, “C’mon, you know you want to,” he teases, making no attempt to hide his smugness. He’s got you right where he wants you. “Just say you love me.”
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peanutpinet · 10 months ago
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haii! I saw that you request is open. i want to request with mafia!jaehyun x wife!reader. Jaehyun and your brother (johnny) are known have died, killed by their rivals. unknowingly you're having a child years later, and when the other group saw, they wanted to kill both of you.
suprisingly, you were saved by nct and you mad at them being shadows and hide themselves from you for years especially jaehyun and johnny. so, (especially) jaehyun and the others regaining your trust back and want to be a dad in your child live, you're slowly trust him and others again (maybe there's an incident or something that jaehyun almost being killed cause he saved you and/or child(?)). thank you
Back For You - Mafia! Jaehyun x Wife! Fem Reader (ft Older Brother Johnny)
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HAPPY 2024 EVERYONE!! I HOPE THAT EVERYONE HAD A GREAT JANUARY (jokes on me for saying happy new year but posting this at the end of January) I'M SO SORRY FOR BEING MIA BUT I was away for a 2-week holiday which took a lot out of me. Don't worry, I've tried to write a bit and while this isn't my best writing since I'm still trying things, I hope that the anon who requested this and those who are reading will still enjoy it!! Manifesting a better year for everyone!!
A/N: hi anon, thank you for requesting, it means a lot that you like my writing :(( coincidentally, I have been reading a few nct fics about the reader having the neos’ child but the neo never knew that they had a child. I do want to point out that this specific mafia story won’t be included in the mini mafia universe that I’ve made as the timeline doesn’t really match but I will make another Jaehyun mafia fic in the same mafia universe that I’ve created!
Also, to the anon who requested the Johnny & TY mafia, Jisung mafia, thank you guys for being patient but I am going through my requests (actually shocked I have several of requests because I didn't think my writing would be enjoyable without a smut sometimes). Also, also! TY's girl is making an appearance in the next two mafia fics and her name is Kim Eunji because I used this name for my translated version of TY's first mafia fic over on my Wattpad. Okay, onto the story!
Warnings: suggestive, angst, mentions of pregnancy and child birth, gunshots, blood, lil fluff
It took 5 years of trying to heal yourself from your loss. 5 years to finally be able to accept that it was now just you and your son, Yuno together. 5 years since your husband and brother, Jaehyun and Johnny respectively were reported to have died in a car accident. But those 5 years of acceptance and peace were soon ripped in a matter of seconds.
You were just picking up your son from daycare who was one of the last kids there because you had to finish your shift but when you had just arrived, you saw several black SUVs that came from around the corner.
At first you didn’t think much about it because you have never been associated with anything illegal nor have you done anything wrong in your life.
But right when you picked up your son and headed out, there were several men who came out of the SUVs and stopped in front of you and your son.
Instinctively, you held your son tighter to you as one of the men came towards you, mentioning a name that you have not heard in the past 5 years of your life.
“Are you Jung (Y/N), wife of Jung Jaehyun and younger sister of Johnny Suh?” one of the men questioned which made you wrap your arms around your son, your motherly instinct moved him behind you
“And who are you to ask?” you hissed but the man just chuckled until you noticed the other men surrounding you and your son
“We’d just like to ask you several questions about your husband and older brother. So if you would come with us and have a little chat…” the man mentioned, looking at your son. “We wouldn’t want the kid to see something that he wouldn’t want to see, now would we?”
“Mommy…” your son called out to you but you wouldn’t let him come out from behind you
“I don’t know how you know my name, my deceased brother and husband’s name but as far as I know, none of us have any association with people like you. And plus, like I’ve mentioned, my brother and husband are both dead. If there were any debts that they may have, their lawyer would’ve said something to me years ago” you tried your best to sound brave but in reality you feared what may happen to you and your son; especially when some of the men came closer
“You should come while we’re being civil” the man scoffed as he commanded the other men to take out some of their weapons as you shielded your son from the scene he might witness
But somehow, as if your husband has been protecting you even before your marriage, there were other men who came and took down all the men that were surrounding you before they could even do anything to you or your son.
Amongst the men who helped you, there was one with white/silver hair and black tint underneath. He walked past everyone and stood in front of you, his eyes was big but his eyebrows made him have a more strict look.
What he did next was what you didn’t expect. The man kneeled to your son’s level and even called him by his name. “Hey, you must be scared, aren’t you? I’m Taeyong. You can call me uncle Tae. I know your father very well. You have his dimples and eyes but have your mom’s smile. You’re a brave boy like your dad”
“You know Jaehyun?” You asked as Taeyong looked at you, his eyes turned soft and even looked like he was sorry when he stood back up to face you
“I think he and Johnny should be the one to tell you everything. I have no right to get in between family business” Taeyong mentioned while you stood in shock
“W-what do you mean that he and Johnny…” you stuttered but Taeyong continued before you got to finish your sentence. “They’re alive. Both of them. We found them 5 years ago, barely breathing and they were both in a coma for almost a whole year but enough of that, how about I…”
“How do I know that you’re not using them to get to me or something? For all I know you could be working with those people from before or something” you questioned, making Taeyong sigh until you heard the very voices that you thought you would never hear ever again
“(Y/N)!!!” You heard Jaehyun shout and turning around, you saw Jaehyun, your husband and Johnny, your older brother; both of whom you thought were dead were now in front of you
“H-hey, hey” Jaehyun came and held you in his arms, pulling you to his chest as you sobbed whereas Johnny came to hug his nephew
“Sssh, I’m here. I’m so sorry. I’m alive. We’re alive” Jaehyun tried to calm you down but you broke down even more and hit his chest, pushing him away as your tears covered your vision
“How could you! Both of you!!” You screamed at both men who lied to you for the past 5 years. Both men whom you cherished close to you and mourned hard when you heard about their car crash and no bodies were found 5 years ago
“I cried for both of you. I mourned you both. I had to go through pregnancy and birth on my own. I did everything alone for the past 5 years. Y-you both don’t get to just waltz back in as if nothing happened” you cried, even falling to the ground as your son rush to your side, hugging you
“Sweetheart. Little flower” both Jaehyun and Johnny said at the same time, both coming closer but your son stood in front of you
“H-hey lil peach…” Jaehyun uttered, about to kneel down to your son’s height but just like Jaehyun, your son was overly protective of you ever since he was just 2 years old
“Go away” your son shouted as you tried to calm him but he kept on going. “Don’t make my mom cry”
“Lil peach, I’m not gonna…” Jaehyun tried to reach out to his own son but he was rejected. “No!!”
“You made my mom cry! I don’t want mommy to cry anymore!” Your son shouted but you quickly hugged him, calming him down. “Hey, hey. Jeong Yuno, what did mommy teach you?” you mentioned your son’s name, making Jaehyun tear up a bit because you named your son after his name
“Don’t shout at anyone. Don’t shout to your elders, okay? Especially your dad and uncle” you stroke your son’s head who looks at you with the same worried eyes as Jaehyun’s
“I don’t want you to cry anymore mommy. I don’t want you to get hurt. I don’t mommy sad. I want mommy happy” your son mentioned, making both Jaehyun and Johnny’s hearts clench
“Mommy’s not sad. Don’t worry, mommy’s okay” you cooed your son, hugging him close to you as you lift him up
“(Y/n)…” Jaehyun uttered, trying to reach for both you and your son
“Don’t…I, I can’t deal with this. I want to go home” you mentioned, your voice was clearly tired
“It’s not safe for you to go back home” Jaehyun mentioned. “Then where am I supposed to go Jaehyun?!” You argued back, Jaehyun clenching his fists
“We’ll take you back somewhere safe. Somewhere no one can find nor touch either of you. Somewhere I should’ve brought you to a long time ago” Jaehyun mentioned, directing to you one of the cars
“Little flower…” Johnny breathed but you walked past him, carrying your son tightly and protectively in your arms
“Know that I’m only going with you guys for my son’s safety and not because I’ve forgiven either of you just yet” you uttered, going into the car as Taeyong closed it before it went off
“Get some rest. Both of you. You can talk to her tomorrow” Taeyong mentioned, heading to his own car
“Hyung!” Jaehyun called out to Taeyong
“I told you that you both that you should’ve gone back to her back then. I kept my side of the promise and took care of her when you both went on that mission. But you broke your side of the promise to go back to her” Taeyong stated, looking at his two members
“I understand during the first year because you both were brutally injured from the accident but afterwards?” Taeyong reminded. “I don’t mean to butt into your family business but if either of you forgot, your wife and sister was pregnant and about to give birth when you guys were already awake from your coma. Regardless of your reasoning, both of you should’ve gone back to her. Losing two of your loved ones during pregnancy and birth is not easy and the fact that she went through all of that alone makes me respect her so much”
“I suggest you both discuss on your own. I can only do so much by ensuring her safety. You both already lost the past 5 years with her. Don’t lose her as well” Taeyong advised
Throughout the ride back to NCT’s penthouse, both Jaehyun and Johnny discussed how they were going to try and approach you. Johnny saying that he wants to approach you first because he is your only related family member left and he wants to make sure that you know he will always take care of you somehow.
But Jaehyun wanted the three of you to just sit down and talk so none of you misunderstood one another. Both Jaehyun and Johnny kept debating until they reached the room that Taeyong provided for you and your son.
Softly, Jaehyun knocked on the door, worried that he might accidentally wake you and your son but luckily you were still awake and answered the door.
Upon opening the door and seeing Jaehyun and Johnny, your first instinct was to shut it close but knowing both your husband and brother, you might as well talk it out with them and get it over with.
“What do you guys want?” you questioned, your voice coming out strong and rough, your eyes and nose were still red from all the crying
“Can we talk? The three of us. We owe you a full explanation about what happened and everything” Johnny mentioned, hoping that you’d give him and Jaehyun a chance to explain for themselves
“Not in here. I just put Yuno to sleep. He wouldn’t sleep until I fall asleep” you replied and hearing your reply, Jaehyun wanted to hug you and let you know that he never meant to leave you alone but he restrained himself until you finally accepted his apology and allowed him to be back in both you and your son’s life
“Let’s go next door then, it’s my room” Johnny suggested and you nodded in agreement
You came to find out that your room was situated between Johnny and Jaehyun’s room with Johnny being right next door and Jaehyun across your room.
Inside Johnny’s penthouse, you were welcomed with the modern but minimalistic interior with several additions of rare collectables which you knew your brother had been very fond of since young. You took in his entire place until you saw several framed pictures of him, Jaehyun, some of their other friends and even with you framed in the center amongst the other pictures.
“Do you still like your tea with 90% milk and sugar?” Johnny asked, already at the pantry, brewing up your favourite tea for you
“Yea, I can’t have too much caffeine during the night anyways” you replied, accepting the tea from your brother
“So, you guys going to explain yourselves on leaving me for the past 5 years?” you questioned, looking down at your husband and brother who sat across you
To say you were speechless was definitely an understatement because as much as you tried to understand their point of views, you became angrier than before. Ever since your brother was in high school, he had already been in the mafia and as for your husband, Jaehyun officially became apart of it when he almost graduated high school.
Not only were they able to keep this secret life from you for the past 10+ years, but the fact they also hide themselves for the past 5 years all because they were scared to face you when they were still injured just didn’t make sense to you.
“What the fuck do you mean that you were scared to face me?!” you shouted, standing up from the sofa, angry at both your brother and husband
“Flower, we wanted to back to you, I swear. We were just caught up with other things…” Johnny tried to reason. “We were both badly injured and barely able to process anything…”
“But you got back up. You could’ve come to me. Your friends could’ve said something. I want to understand you but I can’t. Do you know how hard it was when I found out I was pregnant but before I could tell either of you, I saw your car crash on the news. I almost lost my baby. I almost lost my son that day too if it weren’t for your mom coming over to visit me early in the morning” you rambled on, making both Johnny and Jaehyun even more guilty
“Does your mom even know, Jaehyun?” you asked but received no answer from him
“I’m leaving” you let out which made both Johnny and Jaehyun immediately stood up, blocking your way
“I mean I’m leaving this room and going back to see my son. I can’t be in the same room with either of you right now” I pointed out, about to head to the door but a hand grabbed my wrist and from the touch, I knew that it was Jaehyun
“(y/n)…dimple…” Jaehyun let out that nickname he used to call me those years ago
The nickname that he gave me because he would always mention how he consider me as his dimple because his dimple is a part of him and he would always consider me as a part of him. I believed it, until he disappeared and reappeared back.
“Don’t call me that, Jeong” I hissed back, tears were threatening to spill again
“I swear I wanted to come back to you. Both me and Johnny. Me especially. I know what we did was horrible towards you and I’m not asking you to forgive and accept us back immediately but I just hope…” Jaehyun sighed. “I hope that you would at least let me into Yuno’s life. Let me be the father and husband I should’ve been all those years that I was gone”
Immediately, you ripped your arm away from Jaehyun and looked at him with anger and frustration. “You both got badly injured during and needed a year to fully recover fine. Your friends/members not coming to tell me anything about you because it’s classified, fined. But not telling your own mother and letting her, me and our son to believe that you were dead is beyond me. I don’t need words, Jeong. Neither does Yuno. All we wanted was for you to be there but you weren’t. You’re basically 5 years too late”
“I know” Jaehyun let out a shaky breath. “I, we, didn’t mean to lie to you and not come back sooner. We wanted to tell you but we were just waiting for the right time because we wanted to protect you long enough until we weren’t heavily involved anymore”
“Protect? Protecting me from those who were against you or protecting yourself from what might happen if you had told me before you disappeared?” you sighed
“You know what hurts more? Not when I lost both of you and almost lost Yuno that day. But the fact that I can’t hate either of you. I want to hate you both but I can’t. Because I know what it feels like growing up without a parent figure. I tried so hard to be that parent figure for Yuno but I could never replace his dad” you said, making Jaehyun more hopeful
“Don’t think that I’ve forgiven either one of you just yet. But I’m not as cruel as you to not see Yuno or try to be the father and uncle he should’ve had since he was born” you opened the door, ready to go back to your son. “I’m saying that you both can try your best to come back to our lives, but I can’t guarantee that either one of us would accept you. You might be the father Jaehyun but I was the one that took care of him the past 5 years and from what you’ve seen, our son doesn’t even consider you his dad even when I’ve told him and showed him pictures of you. Good night, Jaehyun, Johnny”
You left both men to the quiet and chill room with the loud noise of their own thoughts and guilt.
Despite leaving both Jaehyun and Johnny on a bad note, the two accepted your anger and instead, hearing you let out your own emotion fueled them to try their best to do whatever it took to get both you and Yuno’s apology.
The next morning, right when you were about to leave and bring Yuno to daycare, both Jaehyun and Johnny were right in front of your door as you came out with your son.
“Geezus, can you guys not this early in the morning?!” you sighed as your son gripped your hand tighter
“Sorry. We didn’t want to disturb your morning so we waited out here. But we got some breakfast sandwiches for both of you and caramel latte for you” Jaehyun mentioned, handing you the bag which you accepted
“Thanks. If there isn’t anything else, I really need to go and take Yuno to daycare and I also need to go to work” you mentioned, about to walk past both men but they stopped you before you could take another step
“What is it this time?” you asked, raising your eyebrow
“Sorry lil sis, I don’t think you should be going to work anymore” Johnny said, making you scoff. “You might be my older brother but you don’t have the rights to tell me what I can or cannot do”
“Johnny’s right (y/n). Those men the other day know who you are. It would only take time before other people would find you or Yuno and neither me nor Johnny wants that to happen again” Jaehyun replied, looking at you with those damn worried eyes
“If I don’t work then how am I supposed to afford a living?” you argued, challenging both Johnny and Jaehyun
“We’re both here now. We’ll fund everything. Especially me. I’m going to fun for both you and Yuno. I want to be the father that Yuno deserves to have. You can push me or Johnny away as much as you want but we will still try to squeeze ourselves back into both of your lives” Jaehyun mentioned and hearing his tone, you know how stubborn Jaehyun is going to be
Sighing, you agreed to not go to work and let your boss know that you have to quit so suddenly because of a family issue.
“Fine. I won’t go to work. But I’m not going to let my…”
“Our son” Jaehyun mentioned, making you roll your eyes. “Our son not go to school” you finished your sentence while Jaehyun kneeled down to Yuno’s height
“Of course not. I’ll take him to school and wait until his school ends” Jaehyun mentioned, smiling at Yuno, his dimples showing
But when Jaehyun took his hand out, trying to convince Yuno to come with him, Yuno shook his head. “No. I want to go with mommy”
“Lil peach…your mommy and uncle need to have a chat and I want to get to know you more” Jaehyun tried to convince him but Yuno stood his ground, gripping onto your leg
“Hey, hey lil bud” you mumbled, kneeling to your son’s height, holding his small hands in yours. “What did mommy tell you before?”
“Give daddy a chance” both you and Yuno said at the same time, making Jaehyun want to tear up knowing that despite what he did, you still taught your son to give him a chance
“That’s right lil bud. What happened to mommy shouldn’t be the reason for you to not give your daddy a chance. Also, it’s a good way to know if he’s actually making an effort. Plus, mommy needs to talk to uncle Johnny, okay? When you come back, mommy is going to make your favourite food, braised beef with toppokki” you mentioned, Jaehyun almost choked on his saliva hearing his son’s favourite food being the same as his
“Okay mommy” Yuno mumbled, looking over at Jaehyun who still offered his hand and slowly grabbed it
“I promise that I’ll keep him safe” Jaehyun mentioned, standing back up, softly holding his son’s hand
“On scratch on his body or any drop of blood, I will end you, Jeong” you threatened, kissing your son’s cheek as he kissed yours before letting Jaehyun take your son to daycare
Jaehyun’s POV
On the way down to my car, Yuno didn’t say a word and even when we were in the elevator, out of (y/n) and Johnny’s sight, Yuno let go of my hand which confused me.
“Lil peach…” I let out but Yuno’s reply shocked me. “Yuno. That’s my name. Not lil peach. Only mommy gets to call me other names”
“Okay, Yuno. Can you tell me why you let go of my hand?” I asked as the elevator opened to the car park and I directed him to my car
“Because even though mommy says you’re my daddy, you’re not” Yuno mentioned, getting into the car without my help
After closing the door to Yuno’s side, I went into mine and saw that he already put his seatbelt on his own. “Damn, this kid is too smart for a 5-year-old,” I thought to myself as I drove off
“Why would you say that I’m not your daddy?” I asked
“Because you hurt mommy. You made mommy cry” Yuno mentioned. “You might be my daddy but if you hurt mommy, you’re not my daddy. Wait until I grow up and I will be the only guy that mommy needs”
“You should know that without me, you wouldn’t exist. You can try all you want but I will win your mom back and then let’s see who the guy will come out on top” I scoffed, disbelieved at my own son’s words to me
“You can try but you’re no one to mommy. You’re not related by blood unlike me. You don’t know mommy like I do. You don’t know how hard mommy tries to be strong to take care of me. You don’t know that mommy likes to talk about you. You don’t know that mommy talks nice things about you but to me, you still hurt mommy. Especially when you came back” Yuno mentioned, making me grip the steering wheel harder
“H-Has your mommy been seeing someone else? Another guy?” I asked, being selfish and hoping that (y/n) hadn’t seen anyone else
“No. Though lots of guys have been trying to talk to her but when I ask mommy, she always mentions you” Yuno admitted, making me sigh with relief
“I won’t leave you both again. Especially your mom. I love her so much that I want to come back and take care of her. And you” I mentioned, parking by the daycare, looking at Yuno
“Why are you looking at me?” Yuno asked
“Because I need your help” I mentioned
Your apartment - Your POV
After Jaehyun left with Yuno, Johnny wanted to immediately talk but I told him that I wanted to grab several things from my previous apartment. Johnny agreed and he drove us to my old apartment.
“What actually happened since you found out that we were involved in an accident?” Johnny asked, his voice sounded nervous as we walked into my apartment
“Lots of things happened, John. I almost lost Yuno. I had to sell our old house to have enough money to live for a year or so since both of your accounts sacred and I only had the joint account with Jaehyun but even that, somehow, the account was frozen so after Yuno turned 1, I had to look for a job since I didn’t want to burden Jaehyun’s parents who were both already at old age” I explained, recalling one of the most traumatic moments in my life
“I’m sorry sis. We both are, really” Johnny let out
“I was lucky Jaehyun’s parents were still around. We were all sad at what happened to both of you. Did Jaehyun ever go back to his parents?” I asked but Johnny shook his head
“He was scared. We both were. When Taeyong and the others couldn’t find us, they froze our accounts, everything linked to us. Of course not your or his parents’ personal accounts. That’s how your joint account was frozen” Johnny explained
“What could have possibly scared the two of you more than me and Jaehyun’s parents getting angry at both of you?” I questioned, about to blow a fuse at my confusing brother for his reasoning but Johnny sushed me
“What is it now, John…”I let out but we both hear unfamiliar voices
“I thought you said that you saw that clueless bitch and somehow alived brother walking past here just now” an unknown man stated, making you worry and looked at Johnny who looked pissed
“(y/n), go into your room” Johnny looked at me, his hand was by his waist and I could see him holding a gun. “Now”
I didn’t need to be told twice and rushed to my room, locking it and as I was about to get under my bed, I heard a loud gunshot followed by several grunts. Not wanting to listen to all the noise outside, I decided to call the only other person that could manage to calm me down.
“Hello? (Y/N)” Jaehyun’s voice was a bit taken aback that I called him
“Jae…” I let out
“Where are you? Where’s Johnny? What happened?” Jaehyun asked, his voice was worried
“I’m at my old apartment. Johnny…” I was about to reply but heard another gunshot. “Johnny’s outside, there are some people that I don’t know of”
“Dimple…I’m sorry that you have to go through this two days in a row but one things for sure, we won’t let you be alone anymore. Talk to me dimple, tell me how you’re feeling” Jaehyun replied
“How are you so calm? What if something happens to Johnny and…I can’t lose either one of you again” you replied back
“It’s part of our job, dimple and you’re not going to lose either one of us again. What happened 5 years ago is a one time only. It won’t happen again. Me and Johnny will make sure of it” Jaehyun ensured me
“How’s Yuno? Did he cause any problems for you?” I asked, trying to get my mind off what was happening outside
“No problems at all. He just told me some things, that’s all. You really taught him well, didn’t you. He even stood up against his own father for his mom” Jaehyun joked
“That’s because he didn’t know you like I did” I replied
“And how did you know me, hmm?” Jaehyun teased, making me roll my eyes
Luckily, before I have to reply him, I heard Johnny called out to me. “(y/n)? Are you alright in there?”
“Johnny’s calling. I’ll um talk to you later then Jae. Don’t forget about Yuno” I told him but heard giggling. “Don’t worry about him. Go, Johnny’s going to get worried”
Turning off the call, I opened the door and saw Johnny who looked a bit tired but relieved. Immediately, I hugged him as he hugged back. “I’m okay, don’t worry about me. You’re okay, right?”
“I’m okay. W-what happened out there?” I asked but Johnny shook his head
“Nothing you should worry about. Come on. I’ll help you grab the things you need and we can head back” Johnny mentioned
It didn’t take long to take almost all the things because apparently, Johnny had called some of his friends to come and help us bring some of mine and Yuno’s things back to the penthouse.
Arriving back at the penthouse, Johnny and his friends helped me unpack some of my things and during the tidying up, we heard a ring to the door and Johnny opened it to let Jaehyun and Yuno in. Yuno immediately went up to me and I hugged him.
“Did you have a good day today?” I asked as Yuno nodded and took something out of his backpack, which was a drawing
“My teacher told us to draw something that makes us happy and I draw you being happy even if it’s with daddy and uncle” Yuno mentioned and I looked at the drawing he did
It was a simple kids drawing but knowing our history, it meant a lot that Yuno somehow is slowly accepting both Jaehyun and Johnny in his life even though they have been absent in both our lives for the past 5 years.
Sometime during the rest of the day, you and Jaehyun decided to cook together and after dinner, the two of you were doing the dishes together; reminiscing the times you both were in college and cooking in the small tiny dorms whilst Johnny and Yuno were getting to know each other.
“How did you manage to get Yuno to talk to you and actually like you?” you asked, waiting for the water to boil as Jaehyun was leaning on the counter after washing some of the dishes
“I wouldn’t say that he has completely accepted me but we managed to talk. He’s very smart for a 5-year-old” Jaehyun mentioned
“I know. I worry about him. I don’t want him to mature quickly just because of the situation. I want him to have a normal childhood where he’s loved and can have fun for as long as he can” you mentioned, looking over at Yuno who was actually having fun with Johnny
“(Y/N)” Jaehyun called out to me, making me look at him as he grabbed my hands in his; an act that he always did whenever he wanted to talk about something serious
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for both of you the past 5 years. I’m sorry I was a coward for not going back to both of you sooner and I’m sorry that I can’t turn back time to change all that because I know I would do anything to go back and be with the both of you. Especially you. I should’ve been there to take care of you. I should’ve been there to protect you. I should’ve been there to feel the pain you’ve felt because it was nothing compared to mine” Jaehyun mentioned, kissing the top of your hands, another habit that he likes to do to calm your nerves
“Jae…” you breathed out but Jaehyun didn’t let you continue. “Would you allow me and Johnny back? I know that it’s going to take a lot more to make up for the times we’ve lost but I’m willing to do anything for the both of you and…”
Kiss This time, you were the one that didn’t let Jaehyun continue and landed a soft kiss on his cheek, whilst caressing his jawline with one of your hands.
“You know that I hate all the bullshit talk. You might as well show me how sorry you are” you challenged Jaehyun who felt a sense of relief wash over him
But before you and Jaehyun could continue anything, both Johnny and Yuno came up to both of you. “Umm, sorry to disturb but I’m gonna take the lil guy back to my place” Johnny mentioned and Jaehyun was internally screaming thank you because he finally got to have some alone time with you after 5 years
“Do you need anything or any snacks bub?” you asked your son who just shook his head
“I’m okay, mommy. I wanna play some games with uncle Johnny!” Yuno exclaimed, making you giggle
“Alright. But don’t stay up too late. Go grab your pyjamas and backpack. Johnny, I trust you won’t be irresponsible. He has school tomorrow” you mentioned, looking up at your brother who just shrugged whilst your son rushed to his room
“I won’t. But I’m not so sure about you both so that’s why I’m offering to take care of the lil guy while you both sort things out together” Johnny snickered making you smack his arm while your son comes back, already wearing his backpack
“Bye mommy!!” your son greeted you as you went down to his height and he kissed you on your cheeks
“You behave alright. Don’t trouble uncle Johnny” you reminded as he smiled
“I promise don’t worry” your son replied and he went towards Jaehyun who also kneeled to his height. “Don’t make mommy cry!”
“I won’t lil peach. If she cries it’s because of a movie or something else” Jaehyun mentioned, making you smack his head. “You see. Your mom will kill me before I hurt her anyways”
Shaking his head, your son went over back to you and hugged you before going to grab Johnny’s hands, the two bidding both of you and Jaehyun goodbye.
“I should really get you and him to have more father and son outings before he really rebels against you” you mumbled while Jaehyun went behind you, snaking his arms around your waist, letting his head rest on the crook of your neck, giving it light kisses
“It’s alright. You’ve taught him well enough. He’s looking out for his mom anyways” Jaehyun murmured, sucking on your skin, making you moan as you let your head fall back
“I’ll teach him more though. If you’ll let me. I know that you’re worried but I’m more worried if something were to happen to both of you and I wasn’t around” Jaehyun sighed but you turned around, your hands wrapped around his neck
“I trust you Jae. You maybe a dick for leaving us for 5 years but you promise to make up for it. Then do it. Make up for your lost time with us. Treat us how you’re supposed to treat us those psat 5 years” you challenged him again
Without warning, Jaehyun lifted you up, forcing your legs to wrapped around his waist as he turned you around, making your back hit the wall as he captured your lips to his; one of his hand cupped your jaw, deepening the kiss between you.
When the two of you pull away and looked at each other, the two of you giggle just like when you were in college, sneaking around to make out with each other.
“Shall we continue it here or do you want the bed?” Jaehyun asked but you kissed him instead
“Anywhere Jeong. Just proof to me that you’re not leaving us again. I can’t deal with another loss” you cried but Jaehyun quickly shushed you
“You won’t. I’m promise. I came back for both of you and I’m staying for both of you. I’m sorry, dimple. I’ve missed you too. I’ve missed you so fucking much” Jaehyun kissed your temple, each of your eyes, the tip of your nose and then your lips
Each kiss makes you bring him closer to you as you cried on his chest while he cradles your body. “It’s okay. Let it out” Jaehyun knows that he can make up for all the intimate and sexual needs later and what’s important is to make sure is to tend your needs. Whatever you want or need, Jaehyun will do it.
When you finally relaxed in Jaehyun’s arms, you looked at him again with glossy eyes but to Jaehyun, you’re just as adorable as he remembers. Smiling and flashing his dimples, Jaehyun leaned down to give a softer kiss to your lips but you were the one that craved more.
“Someone’s eager. Bed?” Jaehyun asked but all you could do was nod
Immediately, Jaehyun carried you bridal style just as he did the night of your wedding when Jaehyun carried you to your bedroom.
Because of your motherly sense, you woke up earlier than you would have liked and went to the kitchen, slowly removing Jaehyun’s big arms. When you got to kitchen to make breakfast and check your phone, Johnny already texted you that he already took your son to kindergarten and told you to just rest.
Johnny: I took the kid to kindergarten already. We got some breakfast sandwich along the way and I’m gonna wait for him. You have fun with Jae ;)
You smile as you read the text, not realising that Jaehyun was eyeing you from the corner until you turned to see him leaning towards the wall with only his sweatpants, his chest was still bare from last night’s activities.
“Geezus. Can’t you at least knock. You’re going to make me have a heart attack” you exclaimed, making Jaehyun chuckle as he went next to you, kissing the side of your temple before backhugging you as you attempt to make breakfast
“I wouldn’t dream of it” Jaehyun murmured
The two of you just enjoyed each other’s company whilst making breakfast together until Jaehyun asked you a question that he wanted to ask. “Dimple” Jaehyun called out, making you look at him
“Why didn’t you get mad at me? Why didn’t you make me suffer more and longer? I deserved it you know. 5 years is a long time and not to mention for 9 months you were pregnant and had to raise Yuno on your own with my parents for the next few years. You could’ve made me beg for the next 5 years but you didn’t, why?” Jaehyun asked, making you blink a few times before going to stand in front of him, cupping his jaw in your small hands
“I’m disappointed. Not angry. There’s a difference. I’m still disappointed in you and Johnny but I know that there’s no point in staying angry for too long. Yes, I still don’t fully understand the world you guys are in but I know that it’s not easy at all and you both tried your best to take care of me and Yuno however you can. Let me ask you back. When Yuno turned 3 and I received an email from the bank that our joint account was not frozen anymore, it was you, wasn’t it? When I was struggling to pay the bills and suddenly the landlord said it was all cleared for the next year, it was you, right? When Yuno was sick and there was medicine in the mail, it was from you, wsn’t it?” you asked, and Jaehyun held your hand, rubbing it
“I was a coward. I helped you but I didn’t have the strength to face you. You should hate me” Jaehyun mentioned
“But I don’t because I know that when it comes to family, you would never forget us no matter what. I’m still hurt and need reassurance but I want us to be a family again. Only if you promise to be better” you replied and Jaehyun immediately kisses you
Pulling away for a moment, Jaehyun caresses your face and lets his forehead rest on yours as both your noses touch each other. “I fucking love you, you know that? I promise I’ll be better for you and Yuno. I’m officially back for both of you”
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allisluv · 6 months ago
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Hii can u do something with finnick with reader who is insecure about her looks so she stops eating? So he is very worried and gives her something? I'm sorry if it's something triggering, I just wanted to ask. Hope your doing ok girl love ya! ❤
feelings are not facts.
pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader
summary: finnick notices when you stop eating.
word count: 600 words
content warnings: illusions to an eating disorder / disordered eating, a brief mention of weight, feeling insecure, finnick being sweet. please note that i am not trying to romanticise eating disorders and you are responsible for what media you choose to consume. please read with caution and put your mental health first!!
Finnick O’Dair notices the small things about you; like how your bottom lip trembles just before you’re about to cry or how you push around your food on your plate without really eating anything. 
It doesn’t worry him, not to begin with. At first, he just assumes you don’t have much of an appetite, but then he notices you skipping out on meals and staring at yourself for far too long in the mirror. 
Finnick has never been one for confrontation. It takes him weeks to gather up the nerve to voice his concerns.  
He lays awake for hours on end, tracing patterns down the slope of your shoulders and mulling over his words. Eventually, he drifts off and once he wakes up, your cold side of the bed is what prompts him to sleepily walk through the hallways of your shared home. 
He ventures farther into the kitchen, where he finds you curled up on the sofa in the living room, cradling a book as the television plays in the background. The sun shines through the open patio doors and your hair keeps getting caught in the breeze. 
Finnick flops down on the sofa, careful not to sit on your feet. You glance up at the shift in weight and offer him a weak smile as he leans over to press a kiss to your temple. “Hi honey. Have you eaten anything today?” 
His question catches you off guard and you can feel your eyebrows knitting together. “I– wait, what?” You splutter, abandoning your book altogether and setting it down onto the coffee table. You forgot to mark your page in your haste to brush him off. “Of course I’ve eaten!” you protest, pouting out your bottom lip like a child. 
Finnick can feel guilt eating away at the edges of his chest as he asks, “Honey, what did you have?” He threads his fingers through your hair and gently grips your chin between his finger and thumb, angling your head to get you to meet his eye. “I’m not mad at you, just worried, honey. You’ve not been eating much lately.”
For a split second, you consider crawling out of his lap and lying through your teeth, but it’s Finnick you’re talking to. It’s your Finnick. Your bottom lip trembles and you furiously blink away the tears gathering on your waterline. “I just… I hate the way I look, Finnick.” 
His heart shatters into shards of glass that stab through his ribcage. “What do you mean you hate the way you look, baby? You look beautiful.”
You hesitate. “I don’t feel it.” 
Finnick frowns, and rubs soothing circles down the skin of your hip-dips. “How about we do this, honey?” He makes sure you’re listening before he keeps going. “If you’re feeling insecure or upset or just having a bad day, come and find me; I’m willing to show you all day every day how beautiful I think you are. We’re gonna start small because I know this is gonna be hard for you; what’re you feeling like this morning?”
“I’m not hungry,” you insist, winding your arms around his neck as your stomach growls. Talk about bad timing. 
Finnick arches a teasing brow. “Nice try baby, but that’s not gonna work. How do waffles sound, hm?” 
You shrug your shoulders and thread your fingers through the golden locks of his hair. “I guess you could twist my arm.” The weight in your chest eases as he pecks your cheek and for the first time in weeks, you feel heaps better now that you know you’re not alone
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lovebaela · 7 months ago
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THE DRAGON OF THE NORTH
Chapter 1: A New Life
masterlist l next
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(a/n) hello! I decided to restart my “Ice and Fire” fanfaction because I have so much more ideas for a better story :) even though it’s discontinued, if you would like to check it out here’s the masterlist! I hope you guys will enjoy this one ���� I’m working on the masterlist for this series right now!
UPDATED VERSION OF THIS CHAPTER IS ON WATTPAD
https://www.wattpad.com/1439910833-dragon-of-the-north-b-stark-𝐢-a-new-life
Divider credit: @dingusfreakhxrrington @valeskafics
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°❆⋆Bran Stark x Targaryen OC .ೃ࿔*:・ CW: fem!oc, betrothal (forced marriage), topics of abuse and racism, angst, a lot of fluff, smut (I’ll try lol), and murder.꙳·❅°*˖ Rating: Mature audiences - The mature moments will happen later on. In the beginning, it will mostly just be cute fluff.⋆⁺₊❅.
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Why must the gods be so cruel to me? What could I have possibly done to deserve this life? To be sold off like a slave by my own flesh and blood…I’ll never forgive Viserys. Without Dany, I am alone. Without love. I want to go home. But…where do I belong? The summer isles? No, that can’t be my true home, I never had the chance to live there. Do I belong anywhere?
Daughter of the mad king’s younger brother. Rhaella never knew her mother. She died after giving birth in the Summer Isles, killed by assassins under the command of the new king, Robert Baratheon. When he found out Rhaella’s mother was pregnant, he wanted both of them dead. Rhaella was smuggled out of the isles and sent to her cousins, the last Targaryens.
“I know you’re upset,” Lord Eddard Stark said, placing his hand on top of hers.“But please, believe me when I say this. I will never let anyone harm you. You are under my protection now.”
Rhaella gave him a weak smile back. Rhaella, the same name as the Mad King’s sister and wife. Daenerys gave her the name. Viserys despised the idea of his mother’s name given to the likes of a foreign girl. Even though she was still a Targaryen, he only considered her half and not pure. She took after her mother, with more summer isle features. Her skin wasn’t pale, instead, a light amber and tan that would get even darker in the sun. She had long silver curly hair, unlike her cousins who had straight silver blonde hair. The thing Rhaella hated the most was her eyes. Instead of being a pretty violet color, she had dark purple eyes that almost looked black.
Rhaella looked away from the carriage window to make eye contact with Lord Stark, “My Lord?” She asked, “Why did you accept my cousin’s offer to take me?”
“Well, you see,” he explained, “The rebellion caused great loss for everyone. So many people, loved ones, dead. Especially your family, unfortunately. I’ll never forgive him for his order of murder. When the king found out 3 Targaryens were still out in the world, he wanted you all dead. I wanted to prove to him that even though Areys was mad, that doesn’t mean you all don’t deserve to live. By taking you in and marrying one of my sons, we can show him that you are not our enemies. It took him a while to be fully convinced, but he agreed to let you live.”
”But, my eldest cousin,” Rhaella said. “He…he wants to take the seven kingdoms. I’m not sure how, but that is his plan.”
”I highly doubt he is a true threat,” Lord Stark said.
”you’re right,” she admitted. “He can be a big coward at times.”
That comment made him chuckle.
He has a nice smile, very warm and welcoming. Even though he did come off as cold before.
“Will I have to marry now?” Rhaella asked.
“Oh gods no!” He chuckled, “you are far too young, my son as well.”
“Will he like me?”
“I believe so, you have nothing to worry about. Bran is a good kid. He will treat you right.”
Once they made it through the gates, the carriage stopped. Lord Stark exited first so he could get the door for Rhaella. He gently held her hand as she took her steps down. Once Rhaella looked up from the steps, she saw the Stark family before her. Not letting go of her hand, Lord Stark approached his family to introduce their special guest.
“This is Rhaella Targaryen. As you all know, she will be with us now. Treat her as you would treat each other. If anyone disrespects her, let me know.”
They all nodded. A very handsome older boy approached her, “Hello, my lady, I am Robb,” he told her, “I hope you enjoy Winterfell and welcome!” Before walking away, he kissed her hand. That made Rhaella blush, “T-Thank you.” He had blue eyes and dark auburn hair. It was so dark you could barely tell if it was red. He had to have been the most beautiful boy she’d ever seen.
An older girl walked up to her gracefully, “Hello,” she smiled, “my name is Sansa. I hope we can grow to be like sisters! Maybe even brush each other’s hair, make dresses together, and so much more!” Rhaella gave a slight smile back, “I would love that!” Then a girl, who looked not too older than her, approached saying, “My name is Arya! Don’t worry, we don’t have to do girly stuff together. There are other ways to have fun!”
Then, she met Rickon, the youngest in the family, and their mother Lady Stark. “Oh my goodness,” she exclaimed, “aren't you just a lovely thing? Such a beauty.” Rhaella blushed at the compliment, thanking her.
She must be lying to me. I mean, just look at me! The journey to Westeros was so long that hair became wild and poofy.
”You must be frightened,” Lady Stark said. “Trust me, I never favored the cold myself. I still don’t, but you grow to appreciate it.”
Rhaella couldn’t keep her eyes off Lady Catelyn Stark’s features. Like Robb and Sansa, she had long auburn hair and pretty blue eyes. Her gown was also blue, making her eyes stand out even more.
“Where is Bran?” Lord Stark asked his wife.
“I told that boy to stop climbing,” she explained. “Brandon!”
“Sorry mother!” A voice yelled from above, “I’m coming down!”
When Rhaella looked up, she examined him. He looked to be the same age as her. He had dark brown hair and eyes with freckles on his face. He approached her and bowed, “Welcome to Winterfell, I hope you will take a liking to it.” “Thank you,” she replied.
The atmosphere quickly grew awkward. The two children didn’t know what to say to each other.
Lady Stark took Rhaella’s hand, “You must be exhausted, here, come with me.” She guided Rhaella to her bed chamber and had the handmaidens start a bath. After the bath, she laid on her bed for a quick nap.
After waking up, the handmaidens helped her get into a gown for dinner. The dress was purple with roses embroidered across the neckline. Then, they helped her with her hair. They clearly did not know what they were doing. They aren’t used to doing curly hair like Rhaella’s, but they managed to make something of it. They brushed out her curls, putting them in a half-up-half-down style. The ponytail was braided and put into a bun. After the handmaidens left the room, she looked at herself in the mirror.
I don’t even look like myself anymore.
Tears began to fill her eyes, I just want to go home.
She bolted out of the room, not knowing where she was going. She ran outside the big castle but didn’t dare to leave outside the castle walls. She eventually found an area that stood out to her. The whole vibe was strange as if something or someone was watching her. It was nothing but an old forest with no snow. In the middle of it, was a pool and a tree. A tree she’d never seen before. The huge tree was white with red leaves and a face carved into it. She stared deeply into the tree’s eyes for a while.
Is it staring back at me?
She snapped out of it, shaking her head, and climbed up the tree to sit on a huge branch.
Without Daenerys, I am lost. She didn’t know how long she’d been crying in the tree for, but she didn’t care. Winterfell wasn’t her home.
“Rhaella?” She heard a voice ask.
When she looked up, she saw Bran with a concerned look on his face, “w-why are you crying?”
She wiped her tears. “Sorry, I just miss my sister…how did you know I’d be here?”
“I like to go to the godswood, and climb up this tree,” he said. “Whenever I like to be alone and think. I’m sorry you had to leave your sister.”
“Well, she isn’t my sister, not really,” she admitted, wiping her face. “We are actually cousins. We just call each other sisters.”
He sat next to her, “my family was worried about you. They thought you might have ran away.” He nervously chuckled. “I…I know that we are to be married one day. The idea of marriage scares me.”
She doesn’t respond, only looking down at her hands as she fidgets with them. “I have something for you,” Bran showed her a beautiful blue flower. “That was the reason I was climbing.” He told her. “I wanted to give you something as a gift. I was going to give it to you at the dinner table but here. If I hurt your feelings not being there to greet you, I’m so sorry.” Rhaella took the flower and sniffed it.
“It’s called the winter rose,” he continued. “A rare flower that can grow around the castle.”
“It’s so beautiful,” she smiled. “Thank you.”
”You know, just because we’re betrothed doesn’t mean we have to be in love right now or anything,” he said. “Let’s just be friends!”
”Yeah I’d like that!” She said.
”And just so you know,” he whispered. “I liked your hair better before. Your curly hair is much better.”
She laughed, “You and me both.”
”You’re laughing!”
”So?”
”This is your first time laughing here,” he said. “You have a nice smile.”
”Thanks, Bran,” she said. “You know, my eldest cousin ,Viserys, told me and Dany that you guys were evil monsters. But, you guys aren’t monstrous at all!”
Before Bran could respond, they both hear a voice from down below calling for Bran. An older boy who looked the same age as Robb. He was very handsome with black curls and dark eyes. “I found her Jon!” Bran shouted.
”Well, what are you sitting around for? They are all waiting for you two!” The two of them climbed down from the tree and walked with Jon.
“Forgive me, my name is Jon Snow,” he told Rhaella. “Welcome to Winterfell.”
”I never heard of the last name ‘snow’ before,” she confessed.
Bran began to explain, ”That last name actually means he’s a…well—”
”Bastard.” Jon said. His voice was cold and somber.
”I don’t know what that means,” Rhaella said. “But Viserys called me that sometimes, I assumed as an insult.”
”It means that my father, Lord Stark, had me with another woman. I wanted to meet you when you arrived, but Lady Stark thought it would be disrespectful.”
Rhaella couldn’t help but feel awful for him. There was something about Jon Snow that made him stand out. As if they had a connection. She wondered if Jon felt it too.
“You said that Viserys called us evil,” Bran said. “Then why did he want to send you away to us?”
“He hates me,” she answered. “He saw you guys as an opportunity to get rid of me…”
Once they all made it to the dining hall, all eyes were on Rhaella and Bran. “Well, aren’t you just beautiful?” Catelyn smiled. “Please, have a seat.” Bran escorted her to her chair and went back to his. Before Jon could leave the Hall, Rhaella asked, “Can Jon eat with us please?”
”Ah, I see you met him while you were gone,” Lord Stark said, amused. “Would him eating with us please you?”
Rhaella looked over at Jon, whose eyes lightened up. She looked back at Lord Stark and gave a nod. He looked over at Lady Stark, “What do you say?”
She looked into Rhaella’s sparkling eyes and sighed, “Well, I suppose it wouldn’t hurt…”
Rhaella gave a big smile. Jon pulled a chair next to her whispering, “Thank you Rhaella.”
“I hope you like the dress,” Sansa said. “I made it myself! I wanted to test my embroidery skills and decided to make you one!”
“It’s beautiful,” Rhaella told her. “You should teach me!” Sansa nodded gleefully.
“You know, we all thought you ran off and escaped!” Arya laughed.
“I…I didn’t mean any trouble or offense, I apologize.” Rhaella announced, standing up from her chair and bowing her head. “It was rude of me.”
“No,” Lord Stark said. “You have every right to feel the way you do. Your life changed right before your eyes. But please, believe me when I say this, we are here for you.”
“Aye.” Robb agreed. “If you are having trouble with anyone or anything let us know.” She thanked the both of them for their kindness.
“If you don’t mind me asking, what was it like outside of Westeros?” Catelyn asked.
Rhaella told them everything. Even about the abuse Viserys had done to her. He always yelled at her for the littlest things. The worst thing he ever did was sneak into her bedchamber with a knife. He threatened to cut out her insides if she didn’t cooperate with his plan to send her to the North.
They all had concerned looks on their faces. The abuse never got to her until explaining it out loud. She really did have it rough.
“That doesn’t matter anymore.” Arya said. “You are with us now!”
“Safe and sound,” Sansa added.
Rhaella didn’t realize she was smiling.
”So, Rhaella…you said you were from the Summer Isles right?” Theon asked.
“Yes, why you ask?”
He smirked at Robb before asking, “I heard the women there are quite breathtakingly beautiful?” She could have sworn she heard him whisper “and have nice bodies.”
”Well, I’ve never actually stayed there, I had to flee because of the King,” she explained. “But from the books I’ve read and from what I heard from some servants in Pentos, yes, the women there are quite beautiful.”
”I also heard that they have a passion for love making,” he said. “Maybe I gotta visit there sometime-.”
”Theon!” Lady Stark snapped. “Don’t be disrespectful-.”
”Oh that’s okay!” Rhaella reassured her. “You’re right, Theon! They do have a passion for it. If I were to stay in the Isles, I would have been a prostitute myself!”
Sansa and Lady Stark almost choked on their food, as Robb, Theon, and Jon bursted out laughing at the table. She didn’t understand what was so funny, but she laughed along with them.
”What’s a prostitute?” Rickon asked, innocently. That made the boys start crying from laughter. Theon even fell out of his chair.
”Y-You’ll know when you’re older!” Lady Stark said.
”You’ll fit in with us just fine, child,” Lord Stark said. “Welcome to the family!”
°❀⋆Daenerys.ೃ࿔*:・
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Daenerys never felt more lonely. She missed Rhaella, her real family. She’d never forgive her brother for what he did.
“Daenerys!” Viserys shouted.
He entered her bed chamber, “do not tell me you’re still upset about that savage.”
She felt rage enter her body as he said those words. “She is not a savage, she’s my sister,” she replied softly. “And I don’t understand why you sent her to our enemies.”
“Don’t be an idiot,” he said. “We both know that’s not true. She’s our cousin. Daughter of our uncle and whatever foreign whore he married. She’s not a pure Targaryen like us, Dany. And she never will be. I gave her away because we need allies, even if they are enemies. The Starks are a strong house, and I knew that Lord Stark would gladly take her in. The fool won’t even know of my plans to destroy him and his dear friend Robert.”
Daenerys always considered Rhaella her sister, even if it wasn’t true. They spent all of their time together, never leaving one’s side. It felt like it was yesterday, the day Rhaella arrived in Braavos as a baby. Viserys wanted nothing to do with her while Daenerys cherished her. She had no idea why Viserys was so upset about naming their cousin after their mother. It was only a name after all. She always thought it was much deeper than Rhaella being a “savage.” She never dared to ask him though.
“I have good news.” He announced. She examined his face, his grin looked devious. Truly it wasn’t good news. “I found you a husband,” he said. “His name is Khal Drogo, Magister Illyrio said. A Dothraki savage. When you two wed, I’ll have his army. We can finally go home, sweet sister.”
Home.
All she ever wanted was a home. A home with Rhaella, where they could finally be happy together. With her gone, Daenerys wasn’t sure if it would be home without her.
“And what about her?” She asked him.
“The savage?” He scoffed. “Those Starks have her now. I don’t care what they do to her. As long as we have our alliance with the North.”
Daenerys wanted to cry, but she stayed strong. I will meet her again, one day.
°❆⋆Bran ೃ࿔*:・
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It had only been a couple of months, but for Bran, it felt like he had known Rhaella his whole life. Rhaella also grew close to his sisters but mostly Arya. The three of them were inseparable. Rhaella even taught them some of the Valyrian language. Some nights, the three of them would stay up and read history books about Targaryen history until they got caught by the Septa. For fun, they liked to go sledding and have snowball fights. The older Stark boys and Rickon joined them sometimes, but never Sansa. Ever since Rhaella arrived, Sansa and Arya fought less. It’s like wherever she went, she spread joy. That’s one of the traits Bran liked about her.
Now, everyone is preparing for the arrival of the King.
He overheard his father saying that the King was almost there. Bran felt sorry for Rhaella because she was so stressed out. “What will he do to me?” She asked. He always reassured her, “You are under our protection now, the King approved of you. Don’t worry about a thing.”
At that moment, it was time for Bran to practice his archery. He hasn’t been getting any better. He wanted to show his family he could hit the bull’s eye. First, only Robb was watching him. Then, came Jon and Rickon. Before he knew it, his parents came to watch as well.
“Keep practicing, Bran,” Lord Stark insisted. “Go on.”
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Jon leaned in towards Bran, placing his hand on his shoulder, “Alright, father is watching.”
Jon looks over and sees Rhaella and Arya watching as well, “and her…” he whispered.
Bran took a deep gulp. He didn’t like to get teased about Rhaella. They only do it because we are to be married. We are just friends, good friends.
Bran nodded and started to aim his bow and arrow at his target.
“Relax your bow arm…” Robb commented.
Just before Bran could release the arrow, someone else’s hits the target and another shoots right through it.
All of the boys turned their heads to see Rhaella and Arya giggling. “Hey!” Bran yelled. The girls both curtseyed but quickly took off once they saw Bran chasing them. The kids kept on playing until their father took all of the boys to see an execution. Bran was finally old enough to see one.
“Are you scared?” Rhaella asked him as he was mounting his pony.
“I’m not sure.” He answered honestly.
But I can’t be afraid. My father told me I won’t be a boy forever. I’ll be a man-grown soon. I mustn’t be afraid. I need to be brave. Like Robb and Jon. Wolves are never afraid.
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Taglist: @lover-of-books-and-tea
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bronx-bomber87 · 7 months ago
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Hello my wonderful fandom :) Thank you for all your lovely comments on me being delayed. Not my usual M.O. but I definitely needed the extra time to process. I was GUTTED and absolutely wrecked. Poor D had to deal with my panic spiral for most of Wednesday. (love you lol) I'll be honest I'm still little shook up and sad. Kinda grateful for the 3 week break tbh between episodes. This was a gut punch I wasn't in the least expecting. Hoping we'll get a S7 announcement during this hiatus. *fingers crossed* Get it together ABC. This took me awhile to unpack emotionally so thank you all again for being so patient.
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So I want to preface this post. There will be ZERO And I mean ZERO bashing of Tim in this review from me. Would appreciate that in comments as well. I love conversation you know I love comments. What I don't like is hate being spread. Also nothing on Eric either. I've also seen this which is utter madness. Don't touch our captain. Man loves this fandom so much. Deserves respect. If you came to this review for either of those things please promptly exit stage left. I mean that in the kindest way possible but I love Tim/Eric so it's a non starter with me.
I’ve never so deeply related with a character in all my life as I have with Tim Bradford. I’ll be dissecting this ep to best of my ability. I love both these characters so very much. Why I was knocked out for a couple days before could tackle this. I imagine my thoughts will change when I do my summer in depth one. When we have the rest of the season in pocket. I have to say this won't be mini at all. LOL So lets get rid of that concept right now ha I can't be mini with this ep. I am not brief so thanks for reading. Also hats off to Eric my god he was incredible in this episode. Melissa too killing me left, right and center you two. Let us get started.
6x06 Secret and Lies.
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Poor Lucy looks like me when I’m stressed and drained af. Tamara asking how stressed she currently is? Lucy answering 19.....She looks like a 19 if not worse tbh. This is probably the most time they've spent apart since they got together. Basically living together at this point let's be honest. Other than 6x01 they haven't really spent time apart aside from that UC op in 5x21. *sigh*
Tamara asking if Tim is still ghosting her? Lucy trying so hard to keep it together with her answer. My heart. What a wreck she is without Tim. Do love that we get to see her pin-up board btw. Good shot of her room we don’t usually get. That cupcake poster I love it so much. Although now it makes me sad...
Lucy asking what's wrong? Tamara telling her she wants to move out with some friends from school. Crap. Her moving is the last thing she needs…. But it's good for her even though the idea makes me sad. End of an era. Lucy is right she needs to live with people her own age. Doesn’t make it hurt less though. This is a ROUGH season for Lucy my god. The hits keep coming for our girl and I wanna hug her. Shield her somehow....
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Lucy touching near her tattoo when she reaches Angela. (Mini gut punch.) I do love her coming to Angela about this. If there is anyone who knows Tim like she does it's Angela. Does help she finds his behavior alarming too. I mean of course she does. You can see the immediate worry. The empathy she has for Lucy is there but she holds her cards close in her advice. Telling her to trust him even though it's literally killing her. Not the council Lucy needed to hear or was looking for.
Lucy wanted more action than 'Just wait and trust him.' She has been trusting him but she’s so insanely worried. Going out of her mind with anxiety for her person. It's exuding out of of her and she looks like she wants to cry…Ugh me too Lucy. I’m an empath and an anxious one at that. I would be going out of my mind too…. Angela looks worried as hell though. Even though she isn't conveying that to Lucy at this point. Breaking my heart as she takes off from their convo. Because if she doesn't she'll lose it right then and there.
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God I love Angela Lopez. First off well done on tracking him down. She's just a bad ass. I mean it's one of the reason's Lucy reached out to her tbh. Just gets into his car, drinking his soda, calling him out right away. I love her reasoning saying she can live off Wesley’s trust fund. Lmao. Doesn’t matter as much if she get's fired. 'Wine o'clock.' for her. Gotta love the confidence. I truly hope we get more Tim/Angela scenes the rest of this season. I always adore their dynamic.
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Tim is sold on her reasoning and starts to explain the current situation he's trapped in. Angela taking it all in and assessing everything as he explains. Once Tim has succinctly summed up his current predicament Angela's reply is the best. 'I’m in.' lmao I love this woman. ‘I got your back boo.’ That she does. In more ways than he even realizes at this point.
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Gotta commend Angela calling him out for walking away from Lucy. Not only that but his job to arrest a guy hasn’t thought of in a decade…. Ain’t no one better than her to be there to call him out his crap right now. Not only that but to really dig deep. To know this is far more than what he's sharing. This is why Angela is an incredible detective rooting things out like this. Saying this is more than just protecting Lucy. Her intuition is out of this world.
I mean she's not wrong. Lucy would understand if it was just about the benefits. She would be proud really. Thing is it's about protecting himself too. Which really just scratches the surface of why he is doing this. Tim knows he's caught even if he shrugs it off. She has him dead to rights and he knows it. 'I’m your BFF. I know you.' Ha it’s true whether you like it or not Timothy…Just like Lucy she has your number.
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Angela giving him crap with how they're following Ray. Worried he isn't being smart about this. This is so unlike him to be this sloppy and unfocused. She was right he was tailing too close… Ray catches on to their tail quickly. When he scanned the vehicle made me so nervous. Doing it while he's taunting Tim. He's so detail oriented blows my mind Tim let that get by him. This SL gave me such MASSIVE anxiety as I watched it. Oh my lord.
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The minute they get back to Angela's place she calls him out once again. Asking why he thinks this is ALL his fault? Tim shrugs it off and she refuses to take that as his final answer. Of course Angela was right there is far more to this story. Tim finally opens up to her about what happened. He had been leading his squadron for some time. Looking to move up to Sergeant.
The catch was he couldn’t be promoted if there was rampant criminality in his unit. Ray clearly was in the way of him moving up. Tim figured he could keep it within his unit if they went after him.. Oh Tim…. It was an unsanctioned mission too. Thinking if he could accomplish this would be easy fast track to his promotion.
Kills me to know he was there during the air strike ugh… Details missing from the last episode. The Humvee saved him and Mark but not his other men… I can't imagine what Tim felt in that moment. The immense amount of guilt laid on his soul from here on out. I mean it makes sense why he never left patrol before Lucy. The last time he tried to advance his career this happened. My broken boy.
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Eric CRUSHES this scene. I wanna cry. My poor Timothy. He was more focused more on his career than his oath...Got two of his men killed. My damn heart. He’s so ashamed of himself. The way he points at himself when he says 'leadership.' I knew his military past would be dark but holy crap. I wanted more of his backstory and they delivered that in spades. What a gut punch this had to be for him. No doubt his men were loyal af to him. Would've followed him anywhere and did.
He carries leading those men to their deaths because they followed his leadership. Oof. That is quite the weight to keep on your soul. Also gives us insight to why he shoulders everything. Even when he doesn't have to. Punishing himself for past transgressions such as this. I'm sure when we get to the other side of this season, I will have an even deeper respect for the writers going into his backstory like this. Giving us even more insight to this man.
This hurts so good to get this kind of info. I have no doubt that’s why he shut Lucy out. The shame he feels is overwhelming. I totally get it. Nothing scarier than someone knowing your darkest secrets. Not only that but worrying they’ll think less of you due to it. Tim already struggles with self loathing. Been a theme for him his entire arc on this series. Something I've touched on a lot. This is truly bringing that to light in the most painful way.
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We see Ray scanned Tim's car in order to gain access to it. To check his GPS to see where he's been. How he's been tracking him. When he scrolls down to Lucy's address. Made my stomach sink. Legit felt sick to my stomach....
I do love Lucy coming home and having Tamara there. Saying she ordered pizza for them. This is exactly what she needs. Do you really have to go Tamara? I wonder if she'll delay leaving now after this ep. There is a knock at the door and of course it's not the pizza. It's Ray. Hair's on the back of my neck stood up from the moment he entered that apt.
I know Melissa stated in her interview she was nervous about this scene. That she came off awkward in her anger. You are incorrect madam. Holy hell Lucy is a BAMF. Telling him the only call she's gonna make is for the ambulance. Because when she's done with him he's going to need it to wheel him out. Holds her ground like the confident bad ass we've all loved seeing her become.
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Lucy calling him shaking and demanding where he was. Ooh lord hell fire coming with her through that front door. I love Angela grabbing Tamara to another room. Like let's go mom and dad are about to have a big blow out. Let's give them some space...
Tim asking if she's ok? Truly concerned but Lucy isn't having ANY of it. 'Do I look ok?' Damn no she doesn't....Ripping into him saying how that creep could've showed up when she wasn't there. Lucy is not wrong....Oh my lord I’ve never seen her so damn mad. She is RAGING at him and rightfully so. Her home was violated, Tamara was put in danger and threatened. All because Tim was trying to protect her. phew.
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Tim FINALLY concedes to telling her something. It only seems to enrage her more. She is literally vibrating with anger in this scene with him. The more he tells her the more it doesn't explain why he left her in the dark. Lucy begging him to read her in. I mean she has earned that my love. ..Telling him to stop protecting her. Gah Tim is a deep loyalist who would protect anyone he loves even if it's not the right thing. His reply is a reflection of that.
'I can't. I won't.' He's so driven to keep her safe. His instinct is to protect her but doesn't see he's hurting her in the process. I knew she was going to be pissed he let Angela in and not her. But Tim was right she has a lot less to lose. Which doesn't seem pertinent in this moment...I do love her placing her hands on his when she also replies. 'I can't. I won't.'
Mirroring his words from moments ago. Just like he will never stop protecting her. Lucy will never stop fighting for him or longing to help him. That man is her entire world. The most important person in her life. It makes perfect sense she would help with this. Career be damned. I mean she risked her career to get him a shot at Metro. Of course she would do the same thing in order to shoulder his burden with him.
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Love her standing her ground in this moment. Like damnit I love you and you are going to let me in. Whether you like it or not I am here and I'm going to help. If this wasn't a reflection of the communication problems that still painfully exist between them I don't know what is. I mean she tried to be patient and trust him. But honestly he needed this kick in the ass to let her in. Which is a problem. Lucy needs to be the first person he goes to. It shouldn't have to come to this. *sigh*
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Their OP goes off without a hitch. Except Ray saying he was going to be an air strike on Tim's life.... God I had no idea as I was watching that scene how true it would be. Tim gets his interview and lies to protect Angela and Lucy. While keeping his own job intact as well. Also welcome back to Jackson’s dad. Hello there Percy. This is not how I wanted to see him again.
But he is IA him returning was never gonna be a good thing tbh in a post Jackson world. Regardless it was nice to see him again. The scene is Grey's office is ROUGH. Never seen Wade so disappointed in Tim. It hurts to watch. Just like this entire gut punch of an episode. Tim is just standing there in utter shame of everything. Ashamed Wade is looking at him like this.
Kills me Grey has to inform Pine of what he did. It makes sense he has to but damn that sucks. The amount of respect Tim has for Wade is immense. To watch him tear Tim apart and just stand there like a puppy being scolded hurts my soul. Especially when he tries to fight Pine knowing. Just dismissing him without further comment or argument...
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So I will say this and it's not at all fair to Lucy that I thought this I'm sure. But I felt like if there was gonna be a breakup it would be coming from her. Not Tim in this moment. That's the part of this moment that really knocked the wind out of me. She had every damn right to be the one too btw. Instead she is there waiting for him with open arms. Honestly I took a breath for the first time this entire episode when she welcomed him in.
Wrapping him up in her arms. Encasing him, rubbing his back, her fingers in his hair. Gently cradling him against her. I thought ok maybe we'll be alright. Since Lucy isn't nearly as angry as she was earlier. Maybe they can get through this together. Cause she loved on him regardless of what happened. The unconditional love she has for this man blows me away. I honestly thought with her loving on him maybe they'd make it out. That they’d work through it together.
Tim looks so very defeated. On the verge of an actual breakdown as he explains that he lied about everything. Saying it saved his job...protected Angela and her. It doesn't seem like enough of a win to him. He looks so very destroyed and this is just the beginning of his downward spiral.
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Lucy is doing everything to be his rock in this moment. To assuage him of his guilt… Most vulnerable ever seen Tim *pre tears*…. Lucy telling him it was an impossible situation. She would've done the same thing. It’s so very clear she was willing to work through this. To build them back to where they were before he got that phone call. Everything Lucy was in this scene represented her unconditional love for him. Tim is just too destroyed at the moment to see it….Also for him to accept it. It's so hard to truly accept unconditional love if you've never had it before. To truly trust in it.
Lucy is watching him spiral out of control. The way he's talking about himself with such loathing. How she never would've been in a place where she put her self interest over her team like him. She is trying her damndest to right his wrong. But Tim is having none of it. It pains me to see it... Pains Lucy too. It's the way she grabs onto him while he continues his verbal self flogging that get's me.
Trying to ground him in this moment with her touch. Bring him back to her. Something that has worked so well in the past. Sadly not having the intended affect this time around. Tim is too damn gone at this point. He feels he’s betrayed everything he thought he was. THOUGHT he was. *heart clutch* Tim has such a deep moral compass. That's why this is rocking him so very much. Ugh my heart. I too have a crazy deep moral compass. I can't say I wouldn't be spiraling out like him as well.
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This was his greatest sin brought to light. To Tim exposing him for the fraud he feels he is. Him saying he's been lying to himself for a long time is a reflection of this. That imposter syndrome coming out real strong here. Something he buried deep down came rushing to the forefront and he is imploding. Says as much above. He no longer feels worthy to be in her life now. I get this anytime I screw up with a friend or my sister. I have this deep sense of shame attached to it. Like I no longer deserve that friend or my sister cause I messed up or if a past sin comes up. That they'll no longer love me or will forever look at me differently cause of it.
It's not logical but it's deeply ingrained from my mom shaming me for doing anything wrong growing up. As it is for Tim. His father literally beat the hell out of him for ever being out of line. He has suffered emotional and physical abuse. Unless confronted and treated comes out like this. Demons making their way to the surface. I was bawling by the time he said 'I'm sorry.' He’s never seen himself worthy of Lucy’s love that much has always been evident. But to see it this raw and visceral ripped my heart out. It’s on the ground where they're both standing.
I think this is something that has been brewing in the background for Tim for a long time. Now that I've had time away to decompress and think. I'm actually very excited they're tackling this. It's clear Tim is not in a place where he thinks he deserves her anymore. Low key never has been. He acts before he thinks. Eric had a great quote from his interview about Tim "He is impulsive and he reacts instead of thinking things through, and it can come out a bit too strong.” That is this decision in a nutshell. He feels he is a burden therefore he is removing himself without thinking it through. The regret that is going to come with this is going to be immense for him.
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'You deserve so much better.' Better than me basically. He feels immense shame and that shame is launching him away from her. You know I learned something in therapy about this. About not being perfect and feeling like I'm too much. i.e. a burden. My therapist told me and it made me cry. 'You are worthy of the space you take up in people's lives. They want you there.' Tim does not think he is worthy of the space he is taking up in Lucy's life now. All his sins on the table laid out for her to see. He can't handle it. That much is very clear here. I will say I haven’t let a ship hurt me like this in a long time.
This absolutely crushed me. I couldn't even fathom assembling my thoughts. Cut me very deep. Been with this ship since day one. Also what a crushing blow this is for Lucy. Our poor girl. I mean she gave everything to this relationship. I mean EVERYTHING. She was all in from the moment Tim said ‘Unless it is.’ This was her first real relationship. First real leap into being serious. Thinking about marriage and kids. She gave her all to Tim my god. Her career took a hit for him and she never complained. Knew he was worth it (he still is btw) Fought every step of the way for him. For them.
When he was pulling back above it was an absolute panic for her. She could see him slipping through her fingers. Idk what broke my heart more Tim thinking he’s not worthy of her any longer or her begging him not to do this. She literally can't fathom how he can let go of her like this. Thought she was his person. Tim feels he’s gone back to who he was pre-Lucy and that scares him. He feels undeserving of the love she has to give him. Lucy knows everything and in his mind he can’t imagine her still loving him.
Lucy was as we all were in this scene. In disbelief... Even though Tim put her though absolute hell she was still there to comfort and support him. Because to her he is worth it even in the hard times. We all know Tim isn’t the best with his emotions. In his trauma damaged brain he thinks he’s doing the right thing here. That he’s radioactive, she deserves better than being around him and his reckless behavior.
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The kiss on her head. Lucy trying to physically push away his rejection. Stomping all over my damn heart...However this ends up playing out Tim is going to have to address his emotional instability. How he charges forward and doesn’t think things through. Ruled by his emotions in the worst way. He’s impulsive and he’s gonna have to fight to get her back when he’s in a better mindset. Her trust has been obliterated by this. She fought and clawed for them and this was her reward. He’s gonna have to do some serious healing to get back to her. Lucy has loved him the best she can but he needs to put in some work now. We see next ep he's meeting with Aaron's therapist. Don't love that but I’ve wanted Tim to go to therapy for years. He needs this. Therapy doesn’t work unless you put the effort in though.
That will be a challenge for him. When I get out of the purview of this hurt I’m feeling...I’m actually going to be really impressed and happy they had Tim go through this. Do I think this is the end of them? No I think this is some serious growing pains. It was issues that have been percolating since Lucy did that 5 player trade. Hell probably back in 5x12 when Tim sacrificed himself without telling her so they could stay together. I still think that was romantic because of it's intended nature. BUT was the beginning of the communication problems. They’ve grown so very much in that regard. We’ve seen it but there is still work to be done on that front. It just came to a very gutting painful head.
I still have faith in the writers. I still have faith they’ll be ok. It might not be right away and I'm already feeling impatient tbh. But this is some serious realism being applied to them. It wasn't some random BS angst. Honestly we’re lucky our ship gets the most attention, the best SL’s and two people who LOVE these characters. They absolutely adore them and this ship. If you haven’t read Melissa and Eric’s interviews for this episode I highly recommend. This sucks right now. No two ways about it. But we will survive this storm. They’ll come out stronger than ever. Truly believe that. But for now let's rally around each other and get through this together. There will be brighter days ahead just doesn't feel like it right now. We got this.
~~~
Side notes non Chenford.
Do love Aaron working with Harper all if of all I cared about other than their SL in this one. Nolan's I fast forwarded which I normally don't do but I had no patience for his BS in this ep lol My anxiety was rampant in this ep and had no space for him.
Also RIP Metro Tim for the 6x07 promo. This hurts to see not just cause I enjoyed him in that outfit lol But to see his career take a nosedive like this. I wanted more Tim back story. Didn’t think would hurt like this though....Feel free to comment I love you all for any interaction I get with these. <3
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luimagines · 1 year ago
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Mirror Mirror
Another commission!
They asked for an expansion on Legend’s section on the Fairytale au, which you can read right here!
Masterlsit
Content under the cut!
You were telling him a story from your homeworld. A small princess who had to flee from her home because the evil queen was jealous of her beauty. After finding refuge with seven little men the queen attacked her and left her in a death like sleep with a poisoned apple. Legend fell asleep before he could hear the end of the story but he had hoped that it had a happy ending.
When Legend woke up in rags and was told to get to work, he was too shocked to question anything. He took the bucket and the mop and went into the courtyard.
Sure it was hard work but he was willing to lay low until he figured out how to get out of this place.
And then something stranger happens.
Warrior calls him over and calls him Prince and leads him away from the castle. Maybe this is a rescue mission? Surely they had the wrong guy from the get go. But how can he be confused for a menial servant and a prince at the same time?
When they’re far enough away, Legend feels as if he can let his guard down. With a stretch, he keeps walking forward, not aware that Warrior has stopped walking as well.  “Boy, am I glad that you came along! I had no idea what I was doing but I figured one of you would come help me. Do you know what place this is? I have no idea how I ended up like that compared to everything else. I can’t wait to see the others though. Maybe we can-”
Something metal hits the ground.
Legend turns around with a small jump. “Captain?”
“I can’t do it.” Warrior sits on the ground on his knees with his face held in his hands. His sword is unsheathed and pointed toward Legend.
Legend feels his blood run cold as he takes a few steps back. “I don’t… What happened? What is the meaning of this?”
Warrior gasps and stands, shaking his head. “She’s gone mad. Absolutely mad.”
“Who?”
“You have to run.” Warrior grabs his shoulder and turns him around. He starts to push him forward, into the direction of the forest “You have to run. Never return. She wants you dead! Dead!”
“Wait! Who!” Legend digs his heels into the dirt. “Who wants me dead?”
“The queen!”
“The queen?”
“Yes! You must run! Run boy! Never look back!”
Primal fear overtakes him. He has no weapons, no supplies and someone who he’d trust with his life is telling him to run for his life. So he does so.
Something about this is familiar to him. Being on the run. Being hunted. Needed to look for help. His uncle would know what to do in this situation, his brain supplies despite his better judgment. It’s added salt onto the wound.
Legend trips, falling down what he can only explain as a cliff with lowered consequences. He doesn’t know where he is. None of this is familiar. Where are the others? Why is this happening to him?
He finds a small house in the middle of the woods after he’s run the better part of the morning. There’s smoke coming out of the chimney top. Someone has to be home. 
Legend runs to the door and bangs on it with all his might. He’s out of breath and tired but he needs to get his bearings first.
The door opens.
“Help me!” He says before he can see who answered. He’s panting too hard to look up. “Please! They’re going to kill me!”
“Easy, young man. Who’s trying to hurt you?”
Legend gasps and looks up. Time blinks back at him, leaning down to meet his level. “Take a deep breath. I doubt they’ve followed you this far.”
Legend coughs, heaving too hard for his body to handle. Just how far did he run? “Help… Help me… Please...”
“Who’s at the door, Old Man?” Legend hears Wild asks from the inside.
He allows himself to relax. He’s found the group. He’s ok. They won’t let anything happen to him.
He blacks out.
He wakes up again but this time in a harder bed and a more modest setting. He still has no idea where he is.
“He’s awake!” A young boy shouts. Wind, Legend relaxes again. Friendly faces. People he knows. What a strange nightmare.
“Well hello.” Time enters the room again. He has a steaming bowl in his hand when he sits by Legend’s side. “We were hoping to get some answers out of you.”
“I had a really bad dream.” He rubs his forehead. “I dreamt that I was being chased out of a castle and that I was being hunted for sport. That’s the last time that I let them tell me a bedtime story-”
“Castle? Are you from the castle?” Hyrule asks as he comes into the room as well. “I checked over your body and managed to heal up some of your more major injuries. For someone who was running from the castle’s forces, you’re not as hurt as I expected you to be.”
Legend squints. Hold the phone. No one corrected him. “Where are we?”
“You’re in our cabin.” Time hands him the bowl. It smells delicious. “We go out and forage around in the forest before we’re called to menial jobs around multiple countries. This is unclaimed land. They can’t get you here. You’re safe.”
Legend feels his stomach drop. They don’t recognize him. Why don’t they recognise him? “...Good. I’m glad. Thank you.”
“Of course, we can’t let you stay for free anyway.” Twilight pipes up from the doorway. When did he get there? “But I’m sure we can come to an agreement.”
Legend winces. He misses his items already. “I can’t pay you any money-”
“We’re not asking for money.” He hears from beyond the door. It sounds like Sky. “Just take care of the house while we’re out for the day. Nothing major.”
“House sitting?”
“Yes.” Time smiles gently. “You gave us quite a scare. But if it’s work, then it’s work. Do you agree?”
Legend has to think about it. Where else can he go? It’s not like he knows what’s going on or why they don’t seem to know who he is. He’s the only one who remembers them but they’re the ones that see him as the stranger. They clearly know each other.
There has to be a way to fix this somehow. Legend nods. “I can do that. Thank you.”
“Steal anything and we’ll find you.” Twilight points a finger in his direction.
Time turns to him with a disapproving look. “Pup.”
“I mean it. We don’t know this guy.”
“He’s clearly just been through a lot. Kindness shouldn’t be held overhead.”
“Yeah, yeah Old Man.” Twilight waves him off. “Welcome to our humble home, stranger. I have to get to work.”
“We all do.” Time stands up. He looks to Legend with a look that hurts more than it comforts. “We’ll be back soon. By nightfall if we’re lucky. Don’t be afraid to get yourself acquainted with the house.”
Legend nods and watches them all leave.
This becomes commonplace very quickly. Legend counts himself lucky that he knows how to take care of a home as he does. Granted, the group is messier than he is, but he supposes that’s what happens when you work all the time and with six other people. No one is willing to pick up after other people. But then again, that’s his job now.
He gets used to the quiet fairly quickly. And he gets used to the noise just as quickly when they return. It’s a cycle. One that he finds that he can live with relatively easily. Unfortunately, he’s no close to figuring out where he is or what happened to him.
He tries to snoop through belongings and items but there’s no weapons. There’s no maps. There’s no markers or hints about anything that he wants to know. At least not in a way that he would be able to piece together. Even stranger still, there’s not a single trace of you. You’ve seemed to have vanished into thin air, just like the group’s memories of him.
Paranoid, he makes the excuse of doing a deep clean throughout the house on the off chance that he’s ever questioned about his whereabouts through the day. Twilight seems to be able to sniff him out more than he’d like but with evidence of cleaning, he’s left alone for the most part.
It’s only a few days afterwards that he starts to think that this sounds more like the story you were telling than he realized. 
As he falls into a routine of cleaning, cooking and investigating, he gets a knock at the door.
“That’s weird. They usually just walk right in.” Legend puts the broom on the side, walking towards the door.
He opens it and his blood freezes in its place. “...Zelda…?...”
“Hello.” She smiles sweetly. “I heard you were in trouble so I came to see if you wanted help.”
“How did you get here?” Legend runs a hand over his hair. “What are you doing here?”
Elated he hugs her, not thinking about the consequences. He pulls back, allowing her to enter the house. “It’s so good to see you!”
“Likewise.” She giggles, putting a basket on the table. It’s full of apples.
Legend realizes the truth too late.
He remembers the apples. He remembers what they meant. He was waiting for them. It’s time.
“...You brought food.” He tries to say normally but the words get stuck in his throat.
Zelda doesn’t seem to notice his instant turmoil and picks one off of the top of the bunch. “Of course! I didn’t know what else to bring you but I wanted to help in at least some way.”
She tosses it to him and he catches it with ease. Zelda looks at him expectantly, that ever sweet smile on her face.
Legend thinks that he’s never going to face her again after this. If he makes it out alive that is.
He looks down to examine the apple. It looks normal. Not a bruise in sight. It’s bright red and inviting. What happened in your story again? The princess bit the apple and fell asleep. Did she ever wake up? He doesn’t remember.
Legend wipes the apple against his shirt. Zelda seems to be waiting for him to bite into it. He may not know the ending to your story, but he’s been playing along as it is right? The story has to continue.
He takes a bite.
It tastes just fine at first. He can’t register that there’s anything wrong with it. But then he gets dizzy and falls to his knees. His throat feels like it’s burning and his head feels a hundred times heavier. He blacks out for the second time.
When he wakes up again, you’re over him and weeping.
He grunts. Was this a part of the story? He doesn’t know. What happened after he fell asleep? “...Good morning.”
With a gasp, you shoot up, teary eyed and all and kiss him.
Legend’s eyes pop open. He suddenly feels more awake than he did just a second ago.
You pull back and cry. “Oh thank goodness that you’re alive!”
“I’m alive.” Legend agrees.
You hug him and tuck yourself into the crook of his neck. “I was so scared that I would be too late.”
“Just like your story, you would win in the end.” Legend pats your hair, sitting up. Looking around, he’s back at the campsite, but everyone else looks like they’re still sleeping. Strange.
You shake your head, catching his attention again. “You fell asleep before the end. You missed the hardest part.”
“I knew about the apple though.” Legend whispers. “I hoped you were still around. The story had to go on.”
“Legend, you’re an idiot. Never again.”
113 notes · View notes
aemondapologistfrfr · 5 months ago
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Dethrone - Chapter 3
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Warnings: mention of mutilation, swearing, mentions of bullying
Authors Note: two year time jump, the story fr starts now, high valyrian is going to be in italics, we finally meet our mans
Word Count: 3.1k
⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆☁︎⋆₊ ⊹ ⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆☁︎⋆₊ ⊹ ⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ 
It’s been just over two years since I’ve arrived at Dragonstone. Things were going well, but could always be better. My father never really got better at being a father. He does give me whatever I ask for, but I think it’s just to get me away from him. Rheanrya on the other hand, was hands down the sweetest woman I’ve ever met. I have no idea how she puts up with my father. Knaenna has also lived here with me and has remained my rock and my breath of calm air. 
My dream continues to occur and I feel as if I’m always on the lookout for my white haired King. The only thing that has started to change within it is the amount of witnesses to our union. I feel as though I’ll find him any day now and it’s causing me to be jittery and jumpy.
I’ve been training everyday again with Jace and Luke. It took a lot of persuading when I had first asked them to let me train with them. Now they get mad at me when I drag getting up to meet them at the beach. It helps me feel a sense of control and boosts my confidence to wield a weapon again. They were both surprised to see how light I am on my feet and how easy I was able to best them. 
I’m fairly close with Jace and Luke, but they don’t hesitate to remind me of my life in Runestone. I usually just brush it off as siblings fighting, but sometimes it digs too deep. More days than not, I still feel like an outsider who invaded this family. I’m just thankful to be surrounded by more people than just people whose job it is to take care of me.
Me and Jace were sparing when my father interrupted us. He said they received a raven from Baela, who’s staying at Driftmark, saying there are rumors of Viserys declining health and it seems like crows may be waiting for the throne which piques my interest. Over the years it has always surprised me that Rheanrya is the heir and how little her and my father attend court. They have no idea what’s going on in the realm because they stay holed up here at Dragonstone. 
“This is such bullshit.” Jace scoffs handing the message back to Daemon.
My father leads us back to the castle. We’re all to meet in the hall to discuss what to do now. I’ve been been somewhat caught up on the family fallouts. Everyone tries to avoid talking about our family in Kings Landing as much as possible, at least around me. I’ve been able to read about them, but Jace and Luke have no issue telling me how terrible our cousins are.
“Thank you all for getting here so quickly. You’ve heard the news, which means we’re heading for Kings Landing in the morning. Please pack your things. I need you to be ready by first light.” Rheanrya says decisively. 
We’re sent off to our chambers to begin packing. I wish the circumstances were better as to why we were heading to Kings Landing. I’ve heard plenty of good and bad stories. I want to see for myself. I’m excited to finally be leaving Dragonstone. I do have more freedom here but I was able to explore everything in under a turn of the moon.
Although I haven’t heard much good of our family there, I’m still excited to meet them. It does make me nervous that they’ll shun me. They’ve been sent ravens of my existence, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be as welcoming. I’m secretly hoping I’ll find my King there among our estranged family so I can finally start paving our future.
The rest of the night is a blur. There is so much commotion with all of the preparations for our departure. I close myself off in my room because I’m getting overwhelmed. I try to find sleep, but my mind refuses to turn off. My brain is running in circles of all of the possibilities. 
It seems right when I fall asleep there’s a knock at my door. It’s Kaenna telling me I have to start getting ready. I slowly get out of bed trying to wipe whatever sleep I had off my eyes. 
“It’s so fucking early.” I groan pulling a dress out of my wardrobe. 
“How did you sleep?” Kaenna asks softly trying to tame my hair. 
“I didn’t.” I grumbled pulling my dress up. 
She doesn’t respond. She ties up the back of my dress and leads me over to my vanity so she can start on my hair. We sit in comfortable silence and once she’s done, she walks over my bags to grab them. 
We walk down to the main entrance and I see everyone gathered there. Some men come and grab our bags to bring to the ship. At least I’ll be able to get some sleep on our journey. 
⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆☁︎⋆₊ ⊹ ⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆☁︎⋆₊ ⊹ ⊹₊⋆☁︎⋆⁺₊⋆ 
It seems like we have been sailing forever. We’re all stir crazy and just ready to be on solid ground again. When we start to see the outline of King Landing we are practically jumping off the boat. 
When we finally dock and get off no one is there to welcome us. My father didn’t take this lightly, but Rheanrya did her best to calm him down. She told Jace and Luke to show me around and explore while she and my father go seek out Viserys and Alicent. 
They seemed to have a destination in mind by their fast pace. I trail behind taking in the new scenery. When I finally catch up, I see they lead me to the training yard. Of course. Why would we explore when we could train. I roll my eyes and stand next to them.
They’re pointing out weapons they used to train with and are showing me their favorite ones. Jace points out a spot in the brick that Luke had broken in their younger years. Loud shouts divert our attention to the two men surrounded by a group. 
We walk over and push our way to the front of the circle. I am immediately entranced with the man with the blinding white hair. He’s so graceful with his sword it looks like it’s dancing. I know I’m staring, but I can’t help it there’s just something about him pulling me in and stealing all of my attention.
“No fucking way that’s him.” I hear Jace whisper to Luke. That’s when I notice the eyepatch. Fuck. That’s Aemond? 
“Glad he finally got an eye patch to cover some of that scar.” Luke says with disgust. 
They way they described Aemond to me was not accurate. They made it seem like he was repulsive and I wouldn’t be able to look at him. Here I am and now I can’t take my eyes off of him. I’m conflicted. I know the history between him and Luke, but I can’t help it. 
“Why are you staring at him like that?” Jace whisper yells to me breaking my trance. 
“Nephews, would you like to train with me?” our heads snap in the direction of the velvet voice. “And who is this?” Aemomd turns to me and starts walking over. 
“I’m Viktorya.” I say standing tall trying to calm my nerves as he walks even closer. 
“The infamous, hidden, Princess Viktorya.” He says grabbing my hand and kissing it. “I’m Aemond.” he looks at me with a piercing violet eye as I feel my heart stop.
It’s him. My King. My heart begins to beat again, more rapidly this time. I’ve been looking for him in every man with white hair since I can remember. I can’t help the butterflies in my stomach when he grabs my hand. It feels like pure fire radiating between us. I realize we’re just standing there with our hands in each others and step back and try to find words but I’m at a loss.
“Hm,” Aemond smirks. “I’ll come find you later. Nephews.” he says to Jace and Luke never breaking eye contact with me until he walks away.
He’ll come find me later? What does that mean? I’m nervous to turn towards Jace and Luke. I know they’ll have something to say about that interaction. I couldn’t care less what they have to say. I’m barely able to contain myself to not follow after Aemond like a lost kitten.
“What was that??” Luke asks with raised eyebrows.
“What do you mean?” I respond trying to sound innocent. 
“You were practically eye fucking him since you saw him. Are you not ashamed? That’s Aemond.” Jace says voice getting louder. 
“I was not. You’re being so fucking dramatic.” I huff and walk away not wanting to deal with this. We’ve been locked up on a ship for three days and I’m ready to do something and hopefully run into Aemond.
“You don’t even know where you’re going.” Luke calls after me and I turn back towards him. 
“Rheanrya said we could explore so, I’m going to explore.” I say dully and start walking in the opposite direction of them. 
Kings Landing is filled with people. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this many people in one place. The streets are filled with shouting and laughter. There’s so much to take in. I walk in between bodies and carts taking in all the new smells of food.
I feel bad for leaving Jace and Luke, but I didn’t want to be questioned. I honestly needed some space to clear my head. I feel like my family will think me a traitor for even having a thought of Aemond and never talk to me again. I know I’ve only just met him but all of my feelings just went crazy the moment he grabbed my hand.
I’m walking along aimlessly looking at all of the shops. Stopping to talk with some people on the street. The only goal I have in mind right now is seeing as much as I can. I’m continuously taking in my surroundings trying to memorize it all as if I’ll never be able to return. 
“Should you really be walking around unattended.” Aemond says from behind me making me jump. 
“I didn’t know when you said later, that you meant in 20 minutes.” I turn towards him a smile splitting across my face.
“It wasn’t hard to find you. Your hair stands out.” he says brushing a strand away from my face. 
He’s not making this easy. I can feel my face heat up as I look at him. I barely know him, only what others have told me. I also feel like I’ve known him my whole life because he is quite literally the man of my dreams. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to contain myself with him in front of me. The heat rises between us and I have to step back again and he chuckles. 
“Could I show you around?” he smiles down at me. 
“That would be lovely.” I smile back to him. 
Aemond holds out his arm for me to grab and I smile warmly and grab on. We leisurely walk through the streets as he points out different shops. I have no care to what my family will think. This is my future and they just wouldn’t understand. 
I’m still holding on to his arm as we leisurely stroll around Kings Landing. We walk around in comfortable silence and I have to rein myself in from continuously staring at him. My King. My husband. My love. 
“What have you seen so far?” Aemond asks looking down at me snapping me out of my thoughts. 
“Pretty much just you training.” I look up to him.
“Then you’ve seen it all.” he smirks at me. 
“Yes, of course. I’ve only come here for you.” I roll my eyes and smirk at how true my statement is. 
“Have you now?” Aemond smirks. “Did your “brothers” tell you much about me?” he says leading me down the streets. 
I can hear the strain when he says brothers. Truth is I wouldn’t necessarily consider them my brothers. They never refrained from talking about the mutilation but avoided any other talk of him. This is my chance to gain more insight and see who my “brothers” truly are.
“Um, not much. Just some basics.” I say nervous to upset him over his past. I know it’s been years, but how could one move past being mutilated. 
He leads us into the garden. It’s more beautiful than I expected. I’m so glad he brought me here first. This was one of the main places I was adamant on finding. There are so many plants and flowers I’ve never seen before. I’m enchanted by the life growing around us.
He brings us to a small table with two chairs. He pulls out my chair for me and sits across from me. We stare at each other in silence for a couple of moments until a young woman brings us some drinks. 
“What do the basics of me include?” he asks raising an eyebrow and grabbing his cup to take a sip. 
“They didn’t say very much or much good honestly.” I let out in a breath. “They told me you stole a dragon and that you used to bully all of them. Mostly they’ve just told me of the gruesome night they took your eye.” I look up to him. 
Every time they talk about that night it makes my stomach turn. How they feel so victorious for hurting a family member. I understand that he bullied them, or so they say, but taking his eye is baffling. The viciousness in their voices when they speak about that night never sits well with me.
“That’s what they’ve told you?” he inquires. 
“It never sounded right to me. What they did was malicious regardless of what was said. I’d rather hear about you from you anyways.” I say finally looking up to him to see his face soften. 
“You want to hear my side?” he asks skeptical almost shocked.
“I think they lied. You didn’t when you called them what you did. That’s why I’m sitting here with you.” I say hesitantly reaching across to squeeze his hand. He looks down at my hand in shock. I’m shocked myself. I should be thinking about how we could be seen, but instead I want to know more about this beautiful man.
“Do I not scare you?” he asks leaning back in his chair. 
“What do I have to be scared of?” I ask tilting my head. 
“You only know what you’ve been told about me. As you’ve said, none of it was good. You see this scar on my face. Yet, you sit with me, completely calm.” he says intensely. 
“You want me to be scared of stories and scar?” I ask smiling. 
“I expect it.” he says solemnly looking away from me. 
“Personally, I see you as the rider of the mighty Vhagar, who also happens to have a scar which may make him more attractive.” I say truthfully as he turns to me with his eye squinted. I don’t know what’s gotten into me, I’m blinded by his beauty and all my thoughts are just spilling out.
“Attractive?” he questions tilting his head slightly.
“Yes.” I say definitely slightly nodding my head.
“Hm,” he hums scanning my face. 
“So, tell me how you stole a dragon.” I ask leaning forward. 
“I didn’t steal Vhagar. You can’t steal a dragon.” he says folding his hands. 
“Then tell me. Please.” I search his face for any emotion. 
“She called to me and I answered.” he answers shortly. 
“Aemond just tell me. I want to hear. Good or bad I want to know.” I say looking at him intently. 
I wish I knew what he was thinking. I can tell he doesn’t trust me which is fair. I’m living with the kids who have taken his eye. He expects me to be on their side. I feel like I have no place to take sides when I have no context and wasn’t there. I know things got out of hand, but no one has ever told me the full story. 
“I claimed Vhagar the night of Baela and Rhenas mothers funeral. Vhagar was their mothers. Yet, she called out to me. They were upset when they found out I was the one who claimed her. We all threw vicious words at each other. They all started physically attacking me and Luke ended up cutting my eye out. No one cared. Not even my father. My mother was the only one to advocate for me.” his voice softens as he ends his story looking away from me.
I can tell he’s upset and I have no idea what to say. I reach across the small table to take his hand in mine. I rub his hand with my thumb and then he finally looks up to me with a sad confused expression. 
“You didn’t deserve that.” I say softly still rubbing his hand offering him a soft smile.
“Are you just saying that?” he asks pulling his hand away making me frown. 
“It shouldn’t have gotten to that point. No one deserves to lose an eye over words.” I respond. 
“They’ve always bullied me. I was the only one without a dragon. Do you know how hard that was? Your brothers and Aegon would torment me together. No one was in my corner. I had no one and I still have no one.” he says looking away. 
“I’m sorry. You deserved more.” I say softly. 
“It’s done and over with. Now I have a hideous scar.” he says brushing over his eyepatch. 
“May I see?” I ask nervously biting my lip.
“No.” Aemond says flatly. 
“Please?” I ask in a sweet voice batting my eyelashes.
“If I show you, you’ll never want to see me again.” he looks to me his expression sad.
“I sincerely doubt that.” I say looking at him expectantly. 
“Fine.” he sighs removing his eyepatch. 
I’m in awe. I only expected to see a long, jagged scar. He has a beautifully sculpted sapphire in place of his eye. He’s truly stunning. I know I’m in trouble now. I have no intention of leaving him alone. I realize I’ve just been staring and not saying anything and he grabs his eyepatch to cover up.
“No, no. May I?” I ask gesturing for me to come look closer. 
“As you wish.” he says helping me pull my chair closer. 
As I come closer I can see all of the tiny details and colors of his crystal. It compliments his skin perfectly. I bring my hand up to ghost over his scar when he grabs my wrist to stop my movements. 
“I’m sorry.” I pull back as he quickly puts his eyepatch back on. 
“Are you disgusted?” he asks looking at me intensely. 
“Quite the opposite. I think you’re very pretty.” I admit shamelessly admiring him. 
“Pretty.” he scoffs.
“You’re like sculpted by the Gods. Perfection.” I breathe out. 
Aemond brushes off this compliment and stands up. He offers me his hand and I accept. I’m glad I haven’t ruined this yet. I have no idea where he’s taking me, but I’d follow him anywhere. 
“Where are we going now?” I ask looking to him. 
“I want to show you what I gained when I lost my eye.” he says proudly.
37 notes · View notes
muzicgenerator · 1 year ago
Note
pls could u do a tom kaulitz angst? like he’s arguing w reader and mentions something he knows the reader doesn’t like bringing up, and he has to make it up to her, then it can turn into fluff <3
yep here it is!!
hope u like it and sorry for late reply T_T
(BRO OHHH MY GOD THE ORIGINAL STORYLINE DIDNT SAVE 😭😭😭 so i just made a new one which is this one AGHHH SO MAD RN btw i didnt proof read the entire thing)
⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒
Atonement
Pairing: Tom Kaulitz x Reader
Genre: a bit Angsty, Fluff
Warnings: None
Request Status: closed :(
✩°。⋆⸜ 🎧✮ Last Night on Earth : Green Day
Playful bantering was one of the things you and Tom would do everyday in your relationship.
Sure, serious arguments would rise up which a simple kiss and genuine apology would quickly fix.
However those two won't do it right now.
"The hell do you mean I have trust issues?!"
"What?! It's true! Your ex cheated on you so you're scared to trust me; It's not like I'm gonna do what that guy did!"
Definitely, Tom shouldn't have brought your ex up who has no relation to this quarrel.
He knew how much of a prick he was to you and how he treated you; he even witnessed how devastated you were when you once came to him to seek comfort when you found out for the second time he had been cheating.
And he knew damn well you never wanna hear about the jerk ever again.
However, you did appreciate him admitting he wouldn't repeat the history you had with your past lover.
"The fuck, Tom? That bitch has no connection whatsoever about what we're fighting about right now.
And I saw the way you looked at her! It's like, if I didn't interrupt you both would've shared spits by then." enraged by what he said; you raised your voice to match his volume - which was unlike you since you're the composed one out of you two during serious arguments.
"Sorry but he kinda does! This issue you're having surely started with him. I remember the way you wasted your snot and tears on him and I dried it off.
And please stop being overdramatic, she's just a fan and I wanted to make sure she's happy. Not only with her; I mean with everyone of them!"
Tom tried hard to defend himself instead of admitting his wrongdoing.
"You are such an ass for bringing that shit up again when you know damn well your ass had issues too that I helped you get over with and all I've ever done was try my greatest to understand and care for you!
All I ever wanted was for you to stop looking at other people and look at me.. Am I asking for too much?" your voice whispered in offence and slightly croaked which made you resent yourself more.
Tom realized with wide eyes of what he had done,
"No, no of course not ____. No, look- I'm really sorry for what I said, I really am and-"
"Just shut the hell up, Tom. Save it, I don't wanna hear it right now." you harshly brushed past him to storm off to your apartment's bedroom in fear of hot tears falling down to your cheeks.
He sighed; ashamed in himself. Tom truly regrets letting those harsh and unnecessary words slip his blunt mouth. He knew he was better than this - definitely, he should control his mouth more and think about what he should say carefully during times like this.
The night spent alone in the bed you'd always share with Tom felt cruel.
Not for the reason he's not by your side; it's rather the fact that you're in bed without properly making up with him since you'd always forgive one another the same day.
A big part of you wanted to forgive him - believe that he truly didn't mean what he told you and only accidentally slipped because of the heat in the moment; that we all say things we don't mean when we're mad, and that he really wouldn't stab you on the back with a woman like your past lover did.
The smaller part of you scolded for being such an idiot; for believing a man would stay loyal - that you should call it off before he could do any further damage.
Honestly, you felt devastated just thinking about not being with him; so you eventually came into terms with yourself that the fire will settle down and you'll forgive him and he'll do better.
Don't know when it'll die down but it will. Hopefully soon.
Some relationships are worth fighting for, like you have with Tom.
Hence you will stay strong and prepare for many wars.
But tonight; you wanted and allowed yourself to fall asleep being upset and disappointed at Tom.
You'll let tomorrow do its thing.
✮✮✮
It was the next day and the back of your head was pounding alongside a stiff neck.
You sat up and glanced at the digital clock placed on your night table that read 11:37 AM.
After stretching your limbs out while reminiscing the night before; you decided it's time to wash your face and start making lunch for yourself.
When you turned the knob and pushed it open; you were greeted with the aroma of your favourite dish; one that was always served to you as a child when you still lived with your family - one that you shared its recipe and process with your lover.
"Tom?" you asked in disbelief. You were certain he had left since your ears picked up the sound of the front door being pushed open then close in the middle of the night.
Certainty assured your mind that you'd rather not see his face first thing in the morning after such a night. Boy, were you wrong.
Your lover turned his head quickly; unaware of your presence since he's so caught up finishing, as well as perfecting the dish.
"Oh- love, you're awake. I um.. made breakfast but you didn't get up and it's uh, it's almost time for lunch so I thought I'd make your favourite." he stumbled over his words; which is bizarre.
"The pancakes are on the table, you can eat them later as a snack."
You nodded your head with a tight lipped smile and mumbled a thanks before heading to the bathroom.
Once the door had shut; you quickly drowned your face with water to remove the image of Tom cooking without a shirt on.
It's not like it's the first time you've seen him like that; but the way you're reacting right now is how you feel when you catch him in these types of situations - preferably without the post-fight shit going.
After peeing, washing your hands, brushing your teeth washing and drying your face, and doing your skin care - you forced yourself to go back outside for you cannot stay in the bathroom forever.
When you opened and closed the baby blue painted door; your eyes wandered off to the table and drooled at the sight of the newly cooked meal.
Tom patted the seat beside him with a smile; gesturing you to sit beside him.
You had no choice but to join him for lunch; after all, you are starving.
Instead of giving in to his request, you sat in front of him.
Instead of painting a frown on his lips; he still kept his genuinely proud smile (from cooking such a delicious dish) and handed you your plate and utensils - to which you accepted.
"Let's eat?" Tom asked.
"I don't wanna eat without talking about last night." you said with a straight face.
The man in front of you softly breathed a sigh,
"You're right." he agreed with a nod
"I'll start by saying I'm really sorry, and I didn't mean what I said. I just want you to know I would never even dare to think about betraying you like that, and I was an ass for what I did." Tom seemed to look everywhere but your eyes.
He couldn't bring himself to look at your mesmerizing hues for he was certain his shredded heart would be turned into dust.
"I don't even know why I said those things, I- I know this sounds like bullshit but I swear I really don't mean those things and you're the only person who I have my eyes on.
Please give me another chance I- I'll be better now, promise!" he trailed off and fearfully continued;
"But y'know if uh.. if you don't and wanna call it o-"
"Shut up Tom we're not breaking up." you sighed
"I know you said those to defend what you did, and it slipped out because of the heat of the moment. We all say shit we don't mean when mad, I understand. But what I don't understand is why you'd caress her cheek and look into her eyes like that?" your eyes examined his facial expressions and only saw genuine regret on his face. You hoped he'd look at your eyes and tell you directly why.
Hence, before his ready mouth started to explain; you tell him, "Tom, look into my eyes, please."
You caught the way the ball of his throat bopped up and down; swallowing his saliva. His eyes slowly trailed up from the table to your chest, neck, chin, nose, then eyes.
"She said she'd been a fan since the very beginning of the band's debut. She loved all us a lot, especially me. I asked her if meeting us was a dream come true, she said yeah, and we talked a bit more. Then she asked me to touch her face because she really couldn't believe that it was all happening, which I did."
Tom would look away from the two windows of your soul for a second before meeting again.
He was replied with silence; which kind of scared him.
"____? Please say something."
"For God's sake Tom, why didn't you just start with that last night when I brought it up?"
Tom rapidly blinked once, twice, thrice, then for the fourth time. "... I must've forgot to bring it up because I was so caught up in the moment."
You laughed; a true one, "You mean too focused into bringing my ex up?"
He was speechless by how just a second ago you were dead ass serious, and now crying laughing at what you said.
"Sorry, I'm done laughing now." you giggled before continuing, "Fine, I'll forgive you if you tell me where you went last night."
"I went back to my apartment and did some thinking how to make it up to you and slept there. I went out really early to buy groceries so i can cook your favourite food here."
It was your turn to be speechless.
"...You seriously did that?" you asked with doubt in your voice.
"Yeah, I mean the proof is on the table." Tom chuckled.
You said nothing and finally dug into the 5 star looking meal, soon your lover did as well.
"Sooo, are we good?" Tom hopefully asked after sipping his water from the cylinder glass.
"I guess so." you blessed him with a small smile to which he returned with a big one.
Conversation flowed naturally between you as you ate the savoury food.
If Tom didn't make it as a famous guitarist, he'd definitely be a winner in Hell's Kitchen.
After Tom cleaned put the dishes to the sink; you insisted to wash it since he cooked. He declined numerous times but it wasn't going anywhere since you're more stubborn than him.
"All right, fine. Only if you let me hug you from behind." Tom made a deal.
"Pshh, why're you asking as if you don't do that whenever I do shit in the kitchen?"
Tom rolled his eyes with a smirk drawn on his lips as a reply and proceeded to snake his large hands to your waist; then pressing his chest to your back and resting his chin on the crown of your head.
Nothing could be heard other than the clanking of pans, plates, and utensils, along with the flow of the running water from the faucet.
The comfortable verbal silence and physical contact was very much needed after a fight.
After drying your hands with a cloth; you walked towards the couch and sat with your boyfriend still embracing you from behind.
"What do you wanna watch?" you turned your head to the side to look up at his face.
"Whatever you want, I'm fine with anything." Tom looked down to your eyes, then lips.
Slowly, he leaned his fave closer to yours so he could taste your lips.
Once contact had been made; you couldn't help but melt even more to his touch and wrap your arms around his neck - and he couldn't help but deepen the kiss and caress your waist and back.
Soon enough, the passionate kiss had come to an end to catch their breaths.
"I love you so much. You know that, right?" Tom stared into her hues as the tip of their noses touched.
You slowly nodded and brought your hands up to his hollow cheeks, "I love you more." you said before pulling his face closer to kiss each other's lips once again.
Tom mumbled in-between the kisses, "I love you the most, sweetheart." before deepening it. His tongue soon entered your mouth and both your hands rubbed and caressed your bodies.
The hot post-fight make out session would last as long as half the length of the movie you played in the middle of the session; playing Atonement for the millionth time from your entire life.
After pulling your mouths away due to your jaws hurting; you slept and cuddled like babies.
Feeling the safest in each other's arms.
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pumpkinsy0 · 2 months ago
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Okay I can’t explain why but The Curtis Brother’s I do read as white. (But like with every outsiders character I literally love ANY Ethnicity Hc you throw at them.) That being said I think that The Curtis brother’s have been luckier in certain areas as compared to some of the other greasers,especially given the time.But I don’t think they necessarily realize that growing up, but specifically Darrel.
Ponyboy hangs out with Curly a lot so he isn’t aloof to how Curly is treated by others. He picks up on the small micro aggressions and how he often gets off easier than Curly does, especially at school. Same goes when he’s with Johnny and Dally. It’s something he knows is there but doesn’t quite have the words to explain it. Sodapop I think understands that he has it easier because he gets that he fulfills the all American boy look. He notices this when first starting to work at the DX and how the customers react to him versus how they react to Steve. He knows exactly why they do that too. And Sodapop hates that this is the case but gets he can’t exactly change it. So he makes up for it by trying to distract Steve or making him feel better.
For Darrel..he’s not WILLFULLY ignorant it’s just that he’s had a busy life. Even before he took on his role as guardian, he was always busy with football,school, even Soc Parties. Then after his parents died, he got even more busy.I don’t think he’s quite processed what some of the other greasers go through.
I don’t think it fully clicks when he’s with Two-Bit one day. The two decided to go out shopping at the fancy grocery store, since Darry wanted to go big for Pony’s graduation party. Two-Bit is acting like usual and goofing off, in the process of trying to make Darry laugh.At one point though a nearby lady spies Two and automatically mistakes him for the help. Two-Bit being use to this simply smiles and politely tells her that he’s a customer there. Darry finds that weird at first but then things take a turn when one of the employee starts to follow Two-Bit around the store. Darrel is puzzled by all this and asks Two-Bit about it.Two-Bit shrugs and tells him it’s not a big deal because this thing always happens. It’s not until he says that does it click for Darry. When it does he also starts to get why Two-Bit acts the way he does. Why he often smiles and laughs during a tense situation, or why he doesn’t try to fight back during an argument. Because that’s his way of surviving.For Two-Bit this is just an everyday occurrence in his life, and something that he’s learned to accept long ago. It doesn’t change the fact that Darry is mad on his behalf and most definitely goes back to the same store later to chew out said employee.
((In part based off of me and my own siblings personal experience grocery shopping at one of the more ritzier places. And also because Mexican Irish Two-Bit lives in my head rent free…take with this what you will. Also sorry if it’s long…))
nono i get what u mean!!! and dont apologize for sending long ask i am very nosey and must know what ppl think all the time, i love long asks!!!!
and ur so right, i see the curtis’ as white americans, but boy oh boy am i a sucker for my black curtis bros and anons arab curtis or any curtis bros, like i said, multiverse goin on in my head here!!!
but ik what u mean!!! its not like theyre WILLFULLY ignorant, hell i dont even think theyre fully ignorant period, its just, they dont live it and nobody around them rlly talks about it much (to them at least, mostly bc they feel like they wouldnt get it, which tbh, they wouldnt) and of course its the 60s theyve heard of the racial tensions but theres only so much they can do about it in their own lives???? i hope i explained that well and yknow what i mean😭
and yknow what ALLOW ME TO TALK ABOUT (my :3) SHEPARDS A BIT HERE AS WELL☝🏽☝🏽
bc i hc my shepards to be immigrants from a pretty much fully black place, they never rlly had to deal w the racism that was going on in america, so when they moved here and they started getting attached w all these labels, plus that language barrier, it was hard for them to really understand a lot of the things, so for a couple years, the shepard family wasnt really known and were just barely scrapping by
BUT SKIPPING HOW I THINK THE SHEPARD GANG CAME TO B BC I TALKED ABOUT IT ENOUGH BEFORE
as individual ppl, i dont think ALL the shepards r actually respected, only tim is!!but even then before that he wasnt, he couldnt rlly speak english so he was also just tossed to the side at sone point, maybe even laughed at
angela is fetishized and while she can use that to her advantage, at the end of the day, she as a regular human being isnt taken seriously and respected unless she basically demands it
and w curly, part of the reason WHY hes not taken seriously is bc hes not given the light of day bc hes seen as “not smart”, part of the reason why hes seen as not smart and not given the opportunity to prove himself is bc he is black
NOW when it comes to papercut and this issue, like u said, i do think the curtis, just dont exactly grasp it, but the shepards do, mainly angela and tim, they understand that how they look impacts what they can and cant do, and curly understands it too, but to a lesser degree, he just wants to be and doesnt want to care, but he doesnt realize that he cant rlly AFFORD to do that, bc it could mean life or death for him, couple that w pony not getting it as well, and thats where i think part of the weariness about this couple comes from!!! this is also partially y i demand more tim and angela being protective of curly☝🏽🤓
but at some point, i do believe that pony would try to use the privilege he has to try and help curly from getting into some shit
i could probably explain all this WAY better and more in depth and have more ideas but then id b writing an essay so, i wont bc im LAZY, BUT ANON??? this is SO real
i hope i explained everything well lmao im not rereading this
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getmeoutofhell · 1 year ago
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Ghostface killers texting with y/n part 2!!
This is for @randymeeksistheloml
Summary: basically leaving off from last chapter. Enjoy! 🤗 part 1: chat
Warnings: Ethan gets in a argument with Billy/cussing
Roman: what did I just come back to?
Y/n: don’t worry about it. It’s just them being weird as usual
Amber: Ethan’s such a L 😭😭
Y/n: imma add him back
Quinn: why? You like my brother or something 🤨
Y/n: what? No I just wanna add him back lol
Quinn: yeah sureeeee
*y/n adds Ethan back in the chat*
Amber: aww you added him back
Y/n: 😐
Ethan: why am I back in here?
Y/n: because I added you back lmao
Ethan: oh thank you y/n ❣️
Quinn: OH?!?! Now do you believe me y/n?? 🤨
Stu: 👀👀👀
Billy: maybe E won’t be a virgin sissy no more
Amber: LMAOOO
Y/n: replying to quinn: wdym?? He literally just said thanks. Y’all really getting on my nerves. Dead ass.
Y/n: replying to billy: bro wtf
Ethan: replying to billy: wtf are you talking about?? Stfu
Billy: little bro don’t start with me
Amber: fight fight fight!!
Quinn: lemme get the popcorn 🍿
Y/n: oh shit…
Ethan: replying to billy: no because your weird for saying that. You need to stfu
Mickey: holy shit what’s going on
Roman: right I just got out the shower and all I hear is my phone dinging
Quinn: @ Richie you need to see this
Richie: see what?
Richie: replying to billy: 😂😂😂
Billy: replying to Ethan: make me bitch boy
Stu: uh oh 😰
Ethan: piss off
Y/n: everyone chill out please.
Billy: No this virgin boy mad he gets no play. He ain’t gonna do shit
Billy: @ Ethan, ain’t this you?
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Amber: LMFAOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😭
Y/n: oh my fucking gosh…
Amber: BRO GOT CLAPPED 💀
Ethan: @ amber: bitch ain’t this you?
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Y/n: 💀
Ethan: and billy bob, ain’t this you?
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Quinn: BAHAHAHAH
Amber: replying to ethan: 🖕🏻
Amber: you just mad y/n doesn’t want you
Roman: hey can y’all stfu, imm tryna watch this movie and y’all keep interrupting
Mickey: this shit is so fucking funny
Billy: replying to Ethan: make sure to lock your windows tonight bitch boy
Billy: replying to Quinn: it’s not that damn funny
Quinn: yes it is
*ethan left the chat*
Billy: bitch
Stu: guys, why are we fighting?? 🥺
Billy: Stu shut the hell up
Stu: where’s Charlie??? He barley texts in here. Also billy stop being mean to me 😔
Jill replying to Roman: you can literally turn your phone notifications off dummy
Amber: where the hell you come from?
Roman: don’t start with me Jill. I’m not in the mood
Jill: replying to amber: I’ve just been enjoying reading y’all going back and forth
Quinn: weirdo.
Jill: what bitch?
Charlie: hey y’all…wtf has happened while I was gone?
Roman: a bunch clearly. Where have you been?? I was trying to call you all damn day charlie. It’s your turn to do the dishes
Charlie: chill I was with my friend. You know the one I went on a date with?
Stu: are you gonna tell us who it is yet?? 👀
Charlie: no
Billy: bro just tell us
Y/n: y’all he doesn’t have to if he don’t want to
Stu: why do you care y/n? Sus
Billy: no damn way you just said the word sus
Amber: anyways, where are we heading to next week?
Quinn replying to billy: lmaoo 😭
Y/n: were supposed to be going on a trip to Hawaii
Charlie: yeah
Roman: oh yeah the trip. I’m driving. Also please put Mickey in the damn back of the van.
Mickey: why do I have to be in the back
Roman: because you’re very aggravating sometimes and I can’t have that while I’m driving
Quinn: I’m so excited for the trip. Also who’s buying the snacks for the road???
Billy: make Ethan’s ass do it
Y/n: lol I’m buying snacks for the road
Richie: where am I sitting in the van? Don’t put me by Quinn. I still remember that piece of melted candy I had stuck on me all those years ago from her
Quinn: dramatic
Y/n: how about you guys come over and we can all watch a movie and order pizza? Just stop arguing about every damn thing
Billy: I’m not going around that virgin sissy
Stu: y/n can I got to the store with you when you get the snacks? 🤗
Y/n: ofc!! 😊
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I hope you enjoyed this!! I plan on writing headcanons and maybe a whole fic about you and the group all on a road trip to Hawaii. Send in questions, I like them. 🤭
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detectivereads · 4 months ago
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Delicious in Dungeon vol 7 by Ryoko Kui
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#$!@/5 (my heart was ripped out; the volume is great.)
This post is for fan entertainment, I’m not being paid.
This volume is thicc! Dungeon Meshi Thursday!!!!!!
Ok there is a lot of tension between Chilchuck and Izutsumi, I am hoping in the future they will get along better but for now I can see them butting heads more. But during the fight with the Ice Golem, they do know how to put their differences aside and work together to get the job done.
At first, I felt sorry for Izutsumi, they wanted to be change back to their normal form. Also, I was reading more in The Adventurer’s Bible, understanding their back story a bit more, and I was shocked on what I found out on the part of who placed the curse on Izutsumi. (I will do a separate post on The Adventurer’s Bible; I highly recommend the book.)
Izutsumi seems to have a hard life that leads to major trust issues and will only help if it benefits her and her goals. But she has the pallet of a child that refuses to try new things and will throw a fit if she doesn’t get what she wants.
It also makes me wonder what her life was when she was with Shuro’s group, I mean we do see Izutsumi and the other ladies interact and it does seem that Izutsumi pushes stuff she doesn’t want to do/want on too Tade (even though when Tade fell off the roof, no one asked her to go up and do that chore, she just wanted to be useful.)
Now some of the middle chapters, I am now greatly worried about the group The Canaries. This group seems to have an impressive resume that even Kabru knows and has deeply affected him.
This whole group is elves, and from previous volumes they are looking for the secret of eternal life. That it seems that elves take over dungeons when they get out of hand, and from what Tansu has said that the elves want this dungeon back.
When I got the village part of the volume, I was surprised to see how a village managed to survive in this dungeon for so long. (I know that it’s Sissel magic that is keeping them alive.) But I pity them when they just farm to farm and do not really enjoy the product of their work. Like their sense of taste is so dull and with magic they have no reason to eat.
(Good lord if I couldn’t taste food I would be devastated, I love food and seeing something that you love like sushi or pizza and not being able to taste the cheese sauce and crust and spices, I would be beyond depressed.)
With that aside, these chapters we got a lot of information about Sissel, how he came to Degal kingdom, how he got into magic. How dedicated he is to try to find King Degal.
When Laois’s group got into the village, we meet Yaad, the grandson of King Degal and he is ruling the village they are in currently. Ever since Degal left for the surface, there has been a rift between the surviving Degal family and Sissel.
Yaad explains a prophecy about a person with a winged sword who would come and stop the mad mage and become the ruler of the dungeon. However, they need the help of a winged lion (that is their god that Degal’s people worshipped). But, Sissel has it locked away in the lower levels of the dungeon.
So, Laois has a choice to make.
At end of this chapter after Yaad helps the group leave, we see Sissel asking in a very scary way who was Yaad talking too.
This part makes me worried for Yaad.
The last chapters of the book…. *cue hysterical crying* POOOR SENSHI!!!!!!!!!!!! *uncontrollable sobbing* Oh lord his back story!!! His fear!!!! My god this must have tortured him for so long!!!!
You never see Senshi cry!!!!
Now (*Dries tears*) I do have some conflicted feelings with Laois in this chapter.
I can see where he is coming from, (and maybe its just me being overprotective of Senshi) but when discussing the death of Senshi’s old group, I do wish both Chilchuck and Laois exercised some tact, like talking in private out of ear shot of Senshi.
Laois is thinking is hard to follow sometimes, let’s eat the griffin and see if it tasted like the one from your past, if does yay you didn’t eat your teammates or oh no this doesn’t taste like that meal so that means I ate a team-mate.
However, I did like what Chilchuck said to Laois, that he really needs to stop. This was what I was talking about in my last post with Shuro and communication skills.
Chilchuck has good communication skills, he will not hesitate to call Laois on things that are delicate.
Though when re-reading the chapter again, I am glad that Senshi had such a great teammate to put Senshi who was at the time the youngest in the group. 
DON’T MAKE SENSHI CRY!!!!!!! My poor heart can’t take it!!!!!!!!
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